My PC is in ICU

My PC is in a coma :( My bro has tried to CPR it, but without any success so far. Is it time to let go and give up hope?

Should I plug the tube and call it?

Spectacular Summer

Summer is great! The day is long and people are more energetic or maybe it is just me :p

I have been back from my holiday for 1 week now and I certainly enjoy Auckland summer. The first weekend after I came back to work was a long weekend and Chinese New Year. I caught up with old colleagues for a lovely dinner and saw a spectacular firework at viaduct on Friday. Then, on Saturday, I continued my big mission of uploading photos using dial-up speed. Oh the good old day! In the afternoon, we eventually got out of the house, went to the beach and visited friends. I bounced idea with them and received many good advices on my career. Then we went for a nice bush walk in Wairewa until the sun went down - 9pm!

The last day of the Rat, I was "trapped voluntarily" into going for a morning bush run :o. Then, the rest of day was the Chinese New Year Even Dinner preparation and eating and more eating. My stomach was so full that I was very satisfied in the end of the evening :)

"Wow! There is going to be some firework!" I said excitedly when I saw there was a Light and Fire Show on the programme

"Oh yeah?" He pretended it was a dull idea "What do you think it's going to be like?" He asked uninterestedly

"Errr....like you?"
"Oh! You mean it's going to be SPECTACULAR?"

Taiwan 2009

It's so nice to be home and rested finally after travelling for 2 weeks. Even though it's a short visit, I did enjoy catching up with all the gossip and caught up with family and friends.

I also had my special birthday in Taiwan. It was truly a special day with lots of love and best wishes. I started my day at midnight with a lovely birthday card which I had been carrying since I left New Zealand. Then I went to sleep. When I woke up and turned on my Facebook, I was surprised at the number of birthday messages all around the world :) My parents then took me out for lunch and I had an international phone call before my beauty nap. My birthday cake was really yummy too. All those nice gestures from family and friends made my day.

Thanks everyone who made my special day more meaningful for being in my life.

Bangkok, Ayuthaya

I wasn't as impressed as Myanmar with Bangkok. The humanity made me tired easily. However, the shopping was so good that I almost run out money. In fact, I did :p and I had to exchange some of my back up money so that I had enough money to take the taxi from the hotel to the airport. By the time I arrived the airport, I only had 100 Baht (5 NZD, 3 USD or 100 NTD) left in my wallet :o

Shopping results:

• 1 hat
• 1 pair of sunglasses
• 1 belt
• 1 skirt
• 2 bags
• 3 pairs of shoes :o
  
• 7 T-shirts/tops; and
• some more souvenirs

After shopping for 2 days with the gang, they all left Bangkok and I was back to travel alone. It took me a while to get used to it. I felt lonely and was frustrated when I couldn't gain help easily from the locals. There were less people speaking English in Bangkok than in Myanmar, surprisingly and I didn't 'pick up' other travellers for companion.

Fortunately or unfortunately, the day I went visiting Wat Phra Kaew and the Palace was the New Year Day. Wat Phra was free but the palace was closed due to people lining up to sign the book to wish the king for a long life. I strolled among the old Bangkok and Chinatown without realising it was getting dark. By the time I felt like dinner, I had no energy, so I grabbed a tuk-tuk and it became my best story in Bangkok. Most people heard about those dodgy tuk-tuk drivers and their gem shop scams, but they (tuk-tuk drivers) obviously weren't aware of "Anita" Scam which I got a tuk-tuk drive from Chinatown to Wat Pho for 7 Baht!!!

The next day I went to Ayuthaya and biked around this ancient city. The sun was hot and every temple charging higher entry fee from foreigners! I have to admit that I sneaked into few because it was getting ridiculous and expansive to pay every single temples :p I didn't have lunch until 4 o'clock in the afternoon when I was absolutely exhausted. Even though the sunset was magnificent and I felt so guilty that I didn't make it to the Wat Arun (Temple of Dawn) for the beauty, I just had enough for the day. Home and bed was all I wanted and needed.

My last day in Bangkok was visiting the Weekend Market where had like 130, 000 stalls. I only stayed for the morning as there were just way too many people to bare for me! Then, I visited the Jim Thompson's house.

Maybe it's Bangkok or maybe it's Thailand, but I was amazed on a number of old white man with Thai girl. Is it because of the language? I have to admit that every time I heard Thai people talking, 我骨頭都酥了 (my bones were all went soft) . I was also surprised to see a number of PDA (public display of affection) and lady boys. I am still confused about how this lady boys phenomenon can be so acceptable in a what I see a conservative culture - being in Asia and Buddhism country.

Myamnar - Lake Inle, Mandalay, Yangon, Bagan

I was worry that after getting so comfortable in life in the last few years, I would have felt backpacking too scungy. However, as the plane landed in Yangon International Airport, I got this familiar adrenaline rush and I knew immediately that backpacking is still in my blood!! :D

The trip has been a beautiful experience. The people here really touched me and every now and then there would be something that touched me so much that I had tear in my eyes. I really like the people and it is not just because they always called me pretty :p but also they were so sincere and honest. They might be poor in material wealth, but they are so rich in their pure good hearted kindness.

My soft spot toward Myanmar people went through 3 stages though. First stage, I just loved that they have no harming intention towards others but purely friendliness.

• There was no electricity at night at some places, but I felt safe walking in the dark alley in a foreign village alone as a single female traveller with stranger men sitting next to an open fire on the side street, with reddish chewing tobacco in their mouths and saying "Hi" to me (I had to admit, it took me a day or two to realise that they had no bad intention to me. All they wanted was just to say Hi and made me feel welcome).
  
• People gave me a free ride and got me a cheap taxi.
  
• Random locals/kids just loved to come up to me, talked to me in English and made sure I was okay.
  
• 5 o'clock in the morning, a local horse cart man walked with me to the temple to make sure I wouldn't get lost.
  

Stories like those above really touched me and made me feel so grateful for their kindness. They were poor and they worked hard to earn their living, but they love smiling and singing and most importantly they haven't gone bitter with all the hardship in life. They might not have a lot, but they are so rich in having a simple happy life and having the virtual to be kind.

However, my second stage towards Myanmar wasn't so pleasant. I went bitter after I felt that I couldn't trust people's story and price. I turned hard hearted after a bargaining exercise in Lake Inle. A set of transitional cloth started with 22 USD and I started my bargaining with 5 USD. In the end, the woman agreed to sell me for 10 USD as I walked away from the shop. It really killed me to turn down the deal. I felt awful, but at the same time I lost the trust in people. I hate dishonesty, so having them had such flexible price made me feel really irritated. In Mandalay, young kids were so eager for tourist money. They swarmed towards us with souvenir or wanting to be my guide and hoping in return for some tips. I did give tip for their incredible tourist knowledge, but I refused to buy anything. I could have bought some from one kid and helped one with some lucky money, but I couldn't have helped them all.

They all spoke English well and can also speak simple Spanish, German, French, Italian, Chinese and so on. It seemed that it's all from the same textbook as their questions were all standalised

"How are you?" "My name is ..." "What's your name?" "Nice to meet you" "How old are you?" "Where are you from?" "Do you have any brother or sisters?"

However, they also came up with similar inconsistent stories such as having no mother or no father to gain my sympathy. It really broke my heart to see those kids struggling with life and they had to learn and lie to earn money. I was quite hard hearted even it broke my heart every time when I had to refuse those eager kids with innocent smile. I didn't buy anything from anyone in the first 7 days except an donation to a school. A young man started a school teaching village kids English and Computing for free. I was touched by his ambition and passion, so I made a donation. I couldn't help all the children by buying their necklaces, but I believe education will help them more.

I was glad that I ended my trip in Myanmar with the third stage. I realised that no matter how much I dislike the money eager attitude from some of the people, everyone I came across were still sincere. Venders and kids were disappointed when I didn't buy or didn't gave a bigger tip, but they wouldn't turn bitter or angry at me. They were still friendly and sincere. They changed my mind and touched my heart again. I remember a teenager boy said to me, "Next time when you come, I'll show you the one thousand Buddha and my school. Also, I'll buy you an longi (traditional skirt) as a gift". That was after I refused to give him more tip for showing me around for 3 hours. (His friend got 5USD when I only gave him 3USD).

I did buy some sand painting and necklaces in the last 2 days. Yes, I could be gutted and thought I could have got it for cheaper. It's true that I might cut the price lower to 7USD or even 5USD. However, it's only few dollars less for me, but for them 3 or 5 USD meant much more. Really, those 3-5 USD is nothing for me, but for them it's life! Once I let it go, I was once again in love with the Myanmar people.

Thank you for those who I came across, looked after me and made my trip in Myanmar so memorable :)

Orange Flower

Thank you for the orange flower, shoes, rides, end of month drink, One Tree Hill sunset, drop off and pick up, massage, sleep-in, zoo, looking after me and generally just being you.

Do you know that...
Hippos a.k.a my favorite- River Horse can open their mouth up to 150 degree! They can also go under the water for 5 mins! Alligators can hold their breath for one hour!! Feeding giraffe is cool! They have such long gray tongue. Asia elephants are smaller than African elephant and one of the elephants in the Auckland Zoo is called Burma! The best animal of the day has to be Unclecarlceros.

Mountain Crawl

This time, we went soft! We only 'climb' One Tree Hill, Mt. St John, Mt. Hunbson, Mt. Eden and Big King. It was a fine hot day and it's again nice to catch up with friends and enjoy a bit of urban/nature walk.

I am exhausted after the walk and I can't wait to be in bed to rest.

Needy

It started as few silly teeny-weeny trivials such as rides or shoes, and then it became a much bigger underlying issue - needy!

God! I love counselling!

That empty and guilty feeling came back. I forgot how awful it could be and I thought it would never happen between you and me, but it did.

Thank you for being sorry and quickly super glued me back :)

After so many years, he is still cheating on her. Can I or should I do anything about it? Is it my place to say anything?

I feel quite useless.

I survived Lake Waikaremoana...Just!

It was an remarkable weekend in many levels - physically and emotional!

I cracked down in tear before the weekend even started it. There were just too many issues to handle, but it's amazingly how we can turn all that to a beginning of a beautiful long weekend. He was right about the dead rat - "Would you eat a dead rat now or in a week's time? No, you don't want to eat a dead rat at all, but the sooner the better!"

The group consists of 3 American, 1 Canadian, 2.5 kiwis, 1 Aussie, 1 Indian, 0.5 Taiwanese. We left around 5pm on Friday and arrived the camp site just before midnight.

The tramp was really challenging for me, especially uphill! On Sunday, the weather was horrible. It was wet, raining, gusty wind, hailing and SNOWING! It was the 19 km, 11 hour tramp with steep muddy 3 hour, uphill climbing 1100m above sea level! One of our teammate even suffered hypothermia when they arrived the hut at 6pm and they had to use body heat to warm her up! The second group with me being the weakest link, reached the hut at 7:15pm, just before it got dark. I barely made it, but I was so lucky to have the "Orange Mark" team support me and had all the right borrowed tramping gear. The next day, an woman from the other group said to me
"You look much better this morning. Last night when you came in you looked like you were in shock!"

On Monday, it all cleared up and it was magnificent scenery!!! I thought it was going to be down hill, so I was fool enough to say: Let's sing because now I can join in. Right after I said that, it was a long UPHILL :( - ONCE! Then I saw down hill! I thought it has to be it, so I said: Look at that beautiful scenery! Let's do it (the whole tramp) again! Right after I said that, it was another LONG UPHILL :( - TWICE. The third time, I saw down hill, I kept it quiet and whispered to other: Let's just get this done with.

I enjoy the evening time. After a long day hike, it was such a luxury to be in the shelter, in dry warm cloth and have some warm food. We had no lights nor shower. Everything was very basic, but I felt rich. I felt I had everything I wanted in life - laugher, singing, feeling alive, warm cloth, warm food, birthday cake, people I care for and people who care for me.

I have no voice now - not from singing or laughing, but more likely from the heavy breath, I am exhausted, my muscle are sore - which I didn't realise I have them, but I feel great! Being close to the nature and around the Lord-of-Ring-ish forest make me feel so ALIVE!!

What we tried to achieve is so challenging that both he and I felt like resigning today :(

Now I think I'm so lucky that I didn't get his job :)

New Role

I have been enjoying my new role. My direct boss has showed a lot of encouragement and appreciation of my performance and opinions. I'm so glad to have him as my boss and I work better when I know my effort is appreciated. We respect each other and we make a great team. I don't even mind doing background read during my spare time. That's how much I enjoy my new job!

Today we had a frustrating meeting with all the big bosses. Everyone came with their agenda and expectation and nothing really get done from my perspective. I can see my direct boss was as frustrated as I was and I jumped in to try to save him (us) and get everyone back to our interests. However, it didn't work :( After everyone left, we had a chat and confirmed that we felt the same about the meeting. He encouraged me to continue doing what I was doing disregard the meeting.

I like my boss!

Goodbye Tauranga

I feel sad about leaving TGA this week. Everything I do, I know it's for the last time...for a long while. I am going to miss the people and the lifestyle, especially the two min to work bit! However, my phone didn't feel the same, it went back to Auckland already!!! (I left it in the site visit car!) What's worse was that the guy who took the car is on leave until 4th of November!!!!

I really appreciate the opportunity to work in Tauranga in the last 7 weeks. I have learned a lot of traffic engineering which was what I was hoping to pick up during my stay here. Besides, it has been a great experience to work closely with different disciplines such as planning, geotech, and storm water and feel my opinion matter. I am going to miss the new friends I made and the lifestyle in Tauranga a lot. However, at the same time, I am looking forwards to the new role and new challenge!

I said goodbye in style! I promised myself that I had to do up-down and up-down of the Mount before I leave. I thought I had more time to do the training, but nah, so I had to it today. I walked up, rolling down, crawled up and falling down, but I did it!! So proud of myself!!

Breathe In Breathe Out

I finally "CHOOSE" to come back to Auckland this weekend (Oh well, I lied. There is a meeting on Monday that I have to attend to, but I did want to spend the weekend in Auckland rather than being told so in the last minute!)

We went for a long stroll in my backyard on Saturday - From Caster bay to Browns Bay. It was a beautiful day and it's so nice to enjoy the sun, breeze and smell the flowers. I run into him on the walk, who was taking his parents for a picnic. His mum was so friendly that I was a bit surprised when she hugged me and kissed me on the cheeks :#

After lunch we chased the bus hard and was very lucky to get on it just on time! Phew~ We quickly freshed up ourselves and then went to a birthday do. Again we were having fun outdoor and doing a couple of 'weird' games in Tahaki reserve :)

Today was a resting day for me to have a little space for myself to sort out some chores, but having him around :). I feel fully charged now! Tomorrow, I have to go to a kick-off breakfast at 6:30 AM and also a meeting.

Breathe in, breathe out
Tell me all of your doubts
Everybody bleeds this way, just the same
Breathe in, breathe out
Move on and break down
If everyone goes away, I will stay
We push and pull
And I fall down sometimes
And I�m not letting go
You hold the other line
Cause there is a light in your eyes, in your eyes

- Breathe In Breathe Out, Mat Kearney

Souvenir from Tauranga

I blamed the pay day, but I was so tempting to walk out this shop with 2 bags, 1 sunglass and 1 wallets! It probably has more to do that I am leaving Tauranga soon and I feel like getting some souvenir out of this pleasant working holiday.

"Go on! Tell them the truth. It's because I'm moving down to Tauranga, so you want to run away and go back to Auckland" He said and we all laughed.

Then, he turned around with a paper on his hand,
"I don't blame her. I resigned straight away once I heard that you are coming!"

My AMA journey...

It goes something like this...

Brilliant Interview 8/Sep
He had great faith on me and push me to the level that I didn't know that I was capable reaching. It was an exhausting one and half hour interview, but I was glad with the outcome and many times I surprised at how much I have learned in the last 2 years.

Apparently, I did so well at interview that he started throwing curve balls half way through to demonstrate to the other interviewee my capability - a more senior role that I wasn't applying. He has put my name forwards to the Alliance to consider me as a candidate. I would be really keen on taking up that challenge if that happens! It's going to be a huge responsibility and will be outside of my comfort zone, but I know I'll have great support from people around me even it's a big step up for me. That's why I am so excited about the opportunity and really thrilled. No matter what's the outcome, I really appreciate his support and being taking interests in my career.

Disappointing Result 12/Sep
I had my hope up so much that when I was told I got the job, I was really disappointed even I had the job I applied for. On top of that, I found out that he also got in AMA too. I had a big cry after a thoughtful caring phone call, and then I was as good as new!

Sleepless Night 16/Sep
I couldn't sleep because I couldn't bare the thought to work under him!

Jumping with Joy 17/Sep
At workshop, I found out that he is NOT my boss and we are not even in the SAME TEAM!!!!!

AMA v.s. TGA dilemma 18/Sep~26/Sep
As 1st of October getting close, there are pressure to get me on board with AMA asap to strength the team. My future bosses have put down the deadline as 13/Oct. I understand their perspective and I want to be there too. However, on the other hand ,the ideal date for me to start on the AMA if it was agreeable would be 3rd November. In that case, I would have spent 2 months in Tauranga at that stage making the exercise more worthwhile for both me and the team in Tauranga as well. And of course, I love the life style here. I haven't got fed up with Tauranga yet.

Verdict 30/Sep
After battling to delay my start date with AMA, I still have to cut my stay here short :( Thus, this coming Friday will be my last day. Very gutted, Very disappointed, Very Sad. I tried to list all the pro's and con's on both Auckland and Tauranga. I think Tauranga had 8 pro's when Auckland had only 2 :( (But they are important to me)

Yes, no, maybe. I don't know. Can you repeat the question?

You're not the boss of me now, you're not the boss of me now
You're not the boss of me now, and you're not do big.
You're not the boss of me now, you're not the boss of me now
You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big.

Life is unfair . . .

- Boss of me, "Malcolm in the Middle" Theme Song

City to Surf - 12 km run

I don't know how I got myself into this, but I'm going to do the great walk in Lake Waikaremoana for the Labour long weekend. I start going to the gym and doing as much training as possible from now on. I think I'll DIE, but hopefully by doing all those workout, I'll die slower! That's why I went for a 12 km run this morning (very last entry!!). I saw sunrise though!

"Are we there yet? Are we on 1/Nov yet? Can someone just fast forward to the end of the that 20 km in one day tramp?"

TGA Sweet Shop

I'm so proud of my TGA customer!!!

From the first two weeks that barely half of chocolate was eaten to this week that they finished the whole block of chocolate in a week!!!! I can now retire from TGA. :D

Technical Support isn't too Technical

You know that I didn't want to wash your amperes. The reason is I knew there was something wrong with my washing machine. The maintenance guy came to my apartment this morning and I found out that I have been "baking" my clothes i.e. I haven't been washing my cloth at all. It was set to dry my cloth only all along :(

No wonder my cloth isn't washing properly....and I was smelling very natural recently! :x