Lucenec, Banska Bystrica (BB), Rozomberok

It's really great to get out of Roznava and move on finally. She picked me up from Lucenec and we went to her home. It's an amazing house and it reminds me of my home in Taiwan.

• It's the biggest house that I have ever seen in Slovakia! It's like a hotel! No wonder she studied hospitality).
  
• It's so modern too (heated floor)! Her father and her grandfather built it themselves 15 years ago. It took them 3 years to build - block by block.
  
• They are the most healthy family I have ever met in Slovakia. They even have the same filter jar as his!

We seemed to have a lot in common and it was great to click with someone and have some decent conversation! We chatted about spirituality, yoga, feeling antisocial, depression, counselling, relationships, 6 thinking hats (we are both black), how to make decision, grieving, my feeling about being back Slovakia etc. She then showed me around in Lucenec and it was bed time after some homemade wine. I am happy today!

I am really sick of packing and unpacking now after moving around for 10 days, but I had to keep on going. Too little time, too many people/things to meet/achieve. After saying goodbye to her family (her mother even pack me more sweet for the road), I headed to my Silvester Party (New Year Eve Party)

I really enjoy being by myself and sitting on either train or bus. It's the precious time for me to reflect how I feel after full-on seeing friends. The hardest thing during this trip so far has been in a familiar place and experience how I felt in 2003. There is nothing I can do, but to sit with those feelings. Few people's names have been in my mind. It's rather sweet-sour. There is nothing I want to change, but I still wonder what I would feel, if things were different. Would I feel anything different, if we were still together or/and if he was here with me. However, it turns out to be for the best that I come back to Europe alone this time. If I have taken anyone with me like I wished in 2003, I wouldn't experience the same. It would be great to be able to point here and there and say that's where I had done this and that, but I wouldn't have the chance to experience what I am experiencing.

I love Banska Bystrica (BB)!! It gave me the REAL SNOW!!! :D The real BIG snow flaks was FALLING from the sky and covered me in white!! I spent three hours in BB and tried to look for the trace of me and others. My back was killing me though as I had to carry my backpack for the whole time, but the snow made it all worthwhile. I then moved to Rozomberok to be picked up. I was a little worried as there was no network for a while and I couldn't find my driver to Oravska Lesna. It was fine in the end and I saw LOTS of SNOW in Oravska Lesna!

Summary:

• Wonderful house and healthy family
• Connecting with similar mind
  
• Looking around Lucenec. Saw the ruining of a Jewish Synagogue
  
• Peaceful reflection bus ride to Banska Bystrica
  
• SNOW!! REAL SNOW! FINALLY!
  
• Little incident in Rozomberok
  
• Food: more homemade sweets, Roast Duck, Red cabbage, steamed dumping, finally have light breakfast and lunch with my choice.

Roznava (RZ)

I came to Roznava where I spend my first Christmas in 2003. The first thing after arrival was visiting the grandma. "Moja mala! Moja mala!!". She cooked one of my favour Slovak national dish - Halusky! Now I can leave Slovakia without any regard! The grandma was hugging and kissing me warmly. She was holding my hand the whole time when she was querying my family, my job, my relationship etc. like I was her real granddaughter. She is a very sensitive, caring and wise grandmother who kept everything I gave her, such as my address and her Chinese name I wrote.

His name got mentioned quite a few times during this visit and I was really surprised at their memory on all the little things I told them. However, I got really frustrated after 2 days here though, as the boringness was driving me crazy. I monitored my frustration during my excess spare time and practice my assertiveness and patience, but I knew it's for the best that I moved on.

Snow!! Thank you, Roznava! (Well, again not real snow, but I have lowered my standard of what I call snow now! :( )

Summery

• Visit grandma
  
• Sitting in the bar and around Slovak people, I was the only one drinking pivo?! What's wrong with the nation or me? :x
  
• Checking the town. Nice service in the information center.
  
• Shopping!! Memory food - Kofola (Coke kind of soft drink), 3 Bit (chocolate bar), Horalky (waffle sweet), Figaro (chocolate), Milka (chocolate). I also bought a light jacket because it was 50% off :p
  
• Intense intelligence (ZA) v.s. Boringness (RZ). I got really bored, so I decided to move on, but where should I go?
  
• Drinking party - boring for me, but I was really appreciated her brother and her boyfriend who tried their best to include me. :)
  
• Food: Bryndzove Halusky (yum!), more homemade cookies and cakes, pizza, Zlaty Bazant (Beer), Lubinkine Spaghetti, chicken with rice, Hurka (Black pudding) with bread, wine, roast chicken with pineapple and honey (with potato, of course!), French/Hungarian toast, vege soup, Bird (deep fried stuff meat - chicken with orange, pineapple and raisin), Potato (again!)

Zilina (ZA)

I have never came to Zilina by car and I had to give direction based on my memory from 4 years ago???!! :o I was amazed how vivid my memory is to the place, where I called home for a year. However, my wonderful memory didn't help as I only knew the pedestrian way that our car couldn't get through :x. After driving in circles for 15 min, I was finally home!

Somehow it didn't feel as homey as before. All the people who I lived with aren't here anymore. Besides, due to Christmas holiday most of places were close and the place looked quite empty. I visited the path I used to walk everyday and I also went to my old company. It's still very nostalgic to be back though.

Summary:

• After driving in circles, I was finally back to Zilina
• Visiting his family again.
• I spent most of my awake time talking about intense intellectual issues, such as train operation modelling (CPN software), banker's algorithm for avoiding deadlock, Petri Nets (math language), Stanica (NGO who provides culture space for the community), Mobility Week (Cycle PT), Mulica movement, Zilina's politics/conflict with the latest commercial complex, life couching, meaning of life and happiness, how to be attractive to women, how to be an active citizens, ecologically friendly etc.

  "I would love to indroduce you two together as I can see you two will click straight away"
  "Yes, maybe, but you have to keep him long enough for us to meet!"

• Almost embarrassed myself, but saved by the aunt this time
• " I have seen you naked!" "So do you want to see it again?" :x
• Slovak women are so talent! All the food from bread, cakes, ginger bread house, wine, to tea are homemade. The most precious gifts people brings to important meeting such as first visiting to in-law-to-be are not expansive artifitual gifts from department store, but homemade food - cakes, sweet, and bread
• A ride from Zilina to Poprad -150 km/hr. The mother was so nervous about meeting her son's in-laws.
• Food: Borovicka (Spirit), the most tasty cabbage soups with homemade bread, more homemade cookies and cakes, 2 different homemade bread, Krusovice (Beer), eggs+pork+cheese+capsicum+potato salad, homemade blackberry wine, homemade herb tea (the aunt collect 10 or 12 different herb and followers all year around and blend them. She even gave me a bag! Again, what a hospitality!), and fried fish fillet with potato salad
  

Christmas in Cadca

It's all about eating so far! My jet lag is also almost gone due to all the yummy food and sweet! It's white outside, except it wasn't snowing :(

I love Slovak's hospitality! I have been eating nonstop for two days!! (my goal of losing weight during this travelling is not happening so far!) For those who know my comment on my first impression on Slovakia 4 years ago ( Man's Heaven - beautiful women, cheap beer and ugly guys), I have to joyfully announce the news - Slovak men has evolved for better in the last 4 years!! :D

Christmas Eve

• People starved for the whole day
• Lots of homemade sweets (I have eaten 7 different cookies and cakes).
• It's great that we went for a walk before dinner or I would feel so guilty eating that much of food. The town is very empty, but the grave yard was busy in comparison.
• "Nice scarf" "It's from T" "This is from S" :p
• Txt from NZ warmed my heart. Texts from NZ are also text from the future.
• Candle set ornament (some people light up a candle four Sundays ahead)
• Watched typical Slovak/Russian fairytale Christmas movies: Mrazik (Father Frost), Perinbaba, Popoluska (Cinderella). I also watched the Shrek's Christmas special in Slovak, of course! Oh! The guys from CSI are so sexy while they all speak in Slovak!
• Dinner started with a prayer
• White wine
• The mother cut the bread, put a honey cross on the rice paper and put into bread, which is a representative for the cattle.
• Then the mother gave each of us the rice paper with honey cross and also put honey cross on our forehead
• First course: Potato with milk (it started light as people had fasted for the whole day, not me though :p I can't not eating when there were full of food on the table. That is against my religious.
• Second course: Cabbage soup with potato
• Third course: Cabbage with potato
• Main course: Fishes with potato salad (For religion reason, Catholics here don't eat meat)
• Some money was put under the table cloth until 6/Jan (Three Kings' day) when all the Christmas ornaments are taken down and the money will be donated to the poor or church.
• Dinner finished with another prayer.
• Presents opening. Guess what I got Tatransky Caj (52% alcohol!!) My alcoholic reputation is back
• Midnight Mass. I was going, but after so much food, alcohol and sweet, I just couldn't open my eyes. My jet lag (? maybe it's more to do with alcohol and food :x) kicked in around 8pm, which has been the best so far.

Christmas Day
She and her mother went to the midnight mess and I pretty much fell into sleep around 10pm after they left and didn't even hear them coming back in (good old ear plugs). On Christmas day, I went to the 9am Mass and it was a quiet time for me to do more reflection. After came back to her place, there were more food on the table!! The mother even packed me food for Zilina. What a hospitality! I accepted the offer because I know it will make her very proud and happy. This culture is quite Chinese, I find.

• Morning Mass. *Kiss* *Kiss* " :o Piece to you! You weren't supposed to kiss me!"
• Bread with garlic spread, Bread with ham+cheese+capsicum+tomato, little eyes (bread kebab), chicken soup with noodles and liver, deep fried pork with potato salad

Bratislava and Cadca

Travelling again back to Europe is quite emotional after 4 years, I guess. However, that didn't kick in until I arrived Slovakia this morning. SNOW!! Or at least some pathetic white-pretending stuff falling from the sky when I got off the train. Welcome me I guess. The train station is still the same, but the display board is digital now. The city itself is more colourful with new buildings. I managed to use my rusty Slovak to get myself bus ticket and found my way to the MC flat.

After a catch-up and lovely lunch, I moved north to where I am spending Christmas. My jet lag is still pretty bad. I seem to wake up at 4am and dozed off around 5pm in the last 2days. I almost didn't make it to change train in Zilina, but fortunately, I still remember enough little details to recognise the city and managed to jump off the train in time.

I continued my drinking record for the 3rd night with Slivo with hot tea... :$

Summary:

• No more border control. There is no longer custom officers came on the train and stamp my passport due to the Schengen agreement (no border within EU countries)
  
• Snow or something like that
• Feeling emotional and homy to be back to Slovakia
• Catch up with him and chat about Slovak politics and EU impact (me? politics? Must be his influence)
  
• Almost missed Zilina and Cadca because of falling into sleep
• Internet!! Yay! :D
• Food: Goulash, Korbaciky (cheese, sheep milk) Slivo with hot tea

Stuggart, Esslingen, Nurnberg and Vienna

Stuttgart and Esslingen
It's not snowing, but it was surely cold when I stepped outside in Frankfurt airport. I caught the IC train to Stuttgart and there was him waiting for me. He is the first familiar face I have seen and he is also going to be the last as we are both flying out of Heathrow in January. After a quick tour of his house, we hit the city center. The plan was having hot wine in the evening, but we ended up having it at 11am. It hit me so strongly that I found it so difficult to concentrate. I guess, jet lag and alcohol do not go well together after 24 hour flights. The redness? The cold weather made it all reasonable :$ I had a power nap at 3pm after all the sightseeing and managed to go to the Middle Age Christmas market in Esslingen in the evening.

Summary:

• -5C? What does it mean? Cold! :#
  
• Mercedes and Porsche are everywhere in Stuttgart
• Heated seat in his Mercedes
• Where does the green colour go? Oh wait! It's winter I forgot!
• Hot wine hit me badly
• Sightseeing: Finnish Christmas market, Old palace, New palace, Christmas market
• Middle Age market was wicked with open fire, hot spa and coffee house.
• Catch up with him
• Sleeping around culture is back
• Food: Laugen (bread), Amaretto (hot wine), sugar coated almonds, Brezel (pretzel), Spatzle (pasta-ish food with cabbage), Deie (oven baked bread)

Nurnberg and Vienna
After a good night sleep (apart from waking up at 4am in the morning), I am still convinced that ear plugs are in fact still the best human invention! I didn't even hear my alarm ringing for 21 minute! The traffic was a bit congested so 200 km/hr was unfortunately the highest speed we were travelling in his Mercedes. I caught up my train just in time and had my first class experience - nothing really special. I dozed off again around 4pm and felt so tired!

She was there picking me up and Vienna was slightly whiter-ish than Stuttgart but still no snow yet :( After dinner, we went to the Christmas market and two more hot punches. Again, I found it hard to concentrate (Anita + jet lag + alcohol + any transport = sleepy red Anita :$) and I just wanted to sleep, but I managed to have a quick look around and found myself nostalgic about the place.

Summary:

• 200 km/hr on highway
• -berg means mountain, -burg means fortress
• Vienna finally a more familiar place
• What can two transportation modellers talk about? Modelling! :x
• The famous ice cream place is still there
• Food: Schnitzel (deep fried pork fillet and potato), Berry punch, coconut punch

Flights

I'll try to update my blog as often as possible, but it's going to be more or less like a bullet point travelling blog in the next 7 weeks.

I have to admit that I was quite nostalgic during my 24+ hour journey. I recalled what I was feeling 2003 and how I am feeling 4 years after. There are things I lost in the last 4 years, but generally speaking, I have gained much more in my life.

• There were people who were my rocks and I was holding their hands; now they are no longer be with me, but I have also met new people who fulfill my life and bring me joys.
  
• I was once young, naive, skinny and my future was full of unknown; now I know my way around Europe
• I didn't know anyone on this continent; now I am visiting everyone I met in that year
• I wanted to bring someone special back to Slovakia to share this special memory of mine; 4 years later, I am alone back to this continent
  

Auckland - Hong Kong
Every time I passed custom, I was so afraid that they were going to take my beautiful drinking bottle away. At Auckland airport, the officer took a look at my sexy drinking bottle with water in it and said, I had to get rid it or drink it all - that's a lot of water to drink!! :o I was panicking as I love my new bottle, so I looked around and had a cunning plan quickly to save it.
"Can I water the plant??" I asked
"I don't know what you are talking about, but I am not watching!" He turned his head away and without second thought, I quickly tipped everything into the plant. Phew~~ Saved! He was then amazed at how quickly I can drink the water!

I haven't been sleeping much in the last 3 days, so it was no surprised that I fell into sleep even before the plane took off. However, I managed to stay awake and watched all the films that I want to watch on the way to Hong Kong. Then, I was so sleepy after 11 hour flight that I didn't have the energy to look after my stomach when I was in Hong Kong :p

Hong Kong - Frankfurt
There was a little accident before me boarding the right plane and I blamed the tiredness though . While, I was hugging my bag and sleeping outside of Gate 68, an airline attendant came to every passenger and asked what flight we were taking.
"CX285" I said
"You are in the wrong gate." He said and directed me to Gate 66.

Who would expect there to be TWO flights to the same city within an hour apart?!!! :( Anyway, I hurried up to the right gate and was the last person on board. I drifted off for the entire 12 hour flight and felt like a zombie when I arrived Frankfurt. There must be a big "Leave me along" sign on my face on my way to Stuttgart. It was 6am in the morning after 24+ hour flight. You can't blame me, can you?

Panicking

I was right! I knew I was going to be very stressed out!!! I have been lacked of sleep and been drinking V for the last 3 days!! There seems to be a million things to organise and to confirm. Fortunately, I finally finalise my 2nd night accommodation in Europe today! I know! Pretty shocking eh? :x

Work has also been very stressful with deadline and moody him. It'll all come to the end after today on way or the other.

It's again 2 am and I guess I am adjusting my time zoom already for my trip! This would be possibliy my last post before my holiday. Thus, enjoy reading it and pondering when I am away :)

Marry X'mas and Happy New Year :D

We Won!!

I didn't go to bed until 3am this morning and I can't believe that I am still standing somehow! :o

Moreover, we won!!! Yay! My first win ever since I join my company 2 years ago! (exclude those wins by default or the opponent team lent us their players when we were down players and we ended up winning :x)

I saw this guy charging towards me and I was brave (or stupid) enough to challenge him! I tackled (I got the ball!! ;)) and then the next thing I knew was I got knocked out!!!. I flew backwards after the impact and landed on my head. It hurt quite a bit and I couldn't move or say anything for a while with my eyes close. Then slowly I opened my eyes and wiped off painful tears on my face, I said,
"Sub!"

My team-mate carried me off the field. It took me a while to be aware of my surrounding again. Slowly, people filled me up with detail and I started remembering. However, it was worth it as the guy got sent off and we scored another goal!!!! :D Of course, I took the credit for our tremendous win!!!

I am still feeling a bit dizzying, but feeling much better now!

Last minute efficiency

I am much more efficient(?) when it's last minute! However, if that's the way I get things done, that is the way. I archived quite a bit in term of sorting out my 7 weeks holiday today - digging out currency, finding winter clothes, checking train schedule, connection, planning travel route and confirming where to go in slovakia etc. I'm pretty pleased that I stayed home and got some things done tonight.

My night was quite easy and relax until a surprise visitor came knocking on my window. We couldn't believe how time could fly this fast when we enjoyed each other's company. It was 2 am when I was once again alone. I stayed up even later as I was sorting out my first 2 days in Europe. It was worth it as he is taking a day off to spend time with me and shows me his home! Now as I have sorted out my first night in Europe, next step is finding place to crash for the 2nd night! :x

I know that my stress level is going to escalate as the depart date getting close. So many trivia to do and so little time :(

Shit!

Jesus! It's so dangerous and I can't believe that I fall in sleep behind the wheel!!

We both thought that I was so awake when I left, but I was actually exhausted. The fatigue quickly caught up with me when it's quiet and I was all by myself in the car. I was driving on the motorway when I fall into sleep completely for few macro-second. Fortunately, there was no other cars around me at that time of night, but I was having cold sweat when I suddenly woke up and realised what may have had happened!! It really freak me out and gave me a nip

You are NOT doing that again! glad you are OK :)!!

Christmas in the Park 2007

It gave me a thrill (it had nothing to do with that can of V) when I walked into the domain. The thought that it would be filled up people, which would help Youthline collecting more money, excited me.

I was doing team leader this year and it's so much fun! My team was cool and awesome!! They were so onto it and excited about collection money for Youthline! The weather held pretty well. It lured people into the domain and when everyone had sponsored Youthline generously, it started raining!!

However, I enjoyed the programme less this year. Somehow everything was better last year even the firework. It's still awesome, but I guess I was just too tired by the end of night after looking after my team members. Watching the firework was the highlight of the night! :D

The traffic was scary though! I thought I was so cunny that I parked so close to the domain! Dud! :x WRONG! It doesn't work when no cars was moving!!! It has been a long night, but I felt fulfilling and happy :)

Miss Forgetful

I must have get out of bed on the wrong side this morning :#

I drove in today and after I parked, I realised that I FORGOT my dress - the dress that we girls spend the whole night picking last night! Then I went to pay my parking. Instead of paying for the early bird rate for the whole day, I push the wrong button and only got charged for $2 dollars for an hour!!! Arrhhhhh!!!

I was almost going to go to the cocktail parking with my causal Friday dress - Jeans and T-shirt (because of no parking and bad traffic.) Then he kindly offered to go to my place all the way from Onehunga :$ He even canceled the meeting with his friend. However, just within that few minutes, when he came to pick up my house key, he got a $60 parking ticket!!!!!!

Anyway, the party went well and I finally fulfilled some people's curiosity of me dressing up, drinking and so on.

Stroke & Stride

The weather was so shitting that she and I were totally sulked after the swim&run event finished. It looked like it was us who had just swam 1 km and run 3 km! Those tough participate were all drier than me as they came prepared with changing gear.

I didn't feel too comfortable because of the wet cloth, so we had some dodgy kebab and then just sat in the car and chat. Thank you for sharing and trusting me. I am glad that I could be there for you and listen. Making a decision as such is brave. It's a big step and I know you have thought things through rationally. I wish I could just tell you to follow your heart and your dream without worry, but I am also glad that I was honest with you and let you know my anxiety. I support your decision, but I had to speak up, not because I wanted to change your mind, but because I had to and because I care for you.

Do what feel right for you and I am here to support you.

Jesus! Not on the public road!

White Island

It has been a very long weekend and I am glad that I took the Monday off because it's a lot to recovery from.

I got to meet the whole family! When I said the WHOLE family, I meant the WHOLE family :o So many names and so many relationships! It really tested my memory to the limit, especially Twins! Fortunately, they are all lovely and friendly. I don't seem to have too many idle or awkward moment :)

The trip to White Island was also great! We saw whales!!! Oh and I also saw my breakfast and morning tea TWICE!

Thank you for looking after me! :)

He said it again and it triggered a lot of emotions - a bit of rejection and most of all - shame.

Back from Secondment

Yes? Not quite!

Manager is sending me to another office for another month!! So much for coming back to the office!! Do you see me complaining? No! I quite like it! It was a little bit weird to be back to my home office after being away for so long.

Wallet

On Saturday, I went grocery shopping with her and forgot my wallet, so she ended up paying for me. Today I went out for dinner with him to celebrate his handing in his PHD. When I about to pay for him, I found out that- I left my wallet in the office and he ended up paying for both of us AND lending me bus money, so I can go home :x

How convenient! How embarrassed!

Horse Riding

My butt hurts!

Kate was a good horse, but my Tin Butt was a bit rusty!

Last Day

Today was my last day officially in Newmarket. I was busy for the whole day to tie all the loss ends. I am feeling a bit sad as I said goodbye to everyone and handed in my access key to my supervisor. It has been a really good experience in the last 4 months. I learned a lot and most importantly I discover a field that I am good at and interested in. However, at the same time, I feel so relived that I don't have to do more Trip End tests!! Phew!!!! I am sure they aren't seeing the last of me as I still have some loss ends that I will come back for, possibly tomorrow!

After I left Newmarket, I was exhausted, but there was still Sub Football to come. I played the full game today. I pull my muscle though, BOTH legs. I am okay. I am tough! Ouch! Ouch! Tough! Still Tough!

"Working" from home

Well, that was the plan, then I got carried away. The weather was so great that I decided to enjoy the moment and forgot about work. Having lunch outsides, strolling around the neighborhood, smelling flowers, eating random garden fruits, sitting next to Pupuke Lake, and enjoying the breeze and rain were so worthwhile. I felt my life is full of meaning and happiness after a day like this :)

I'll get over it, but today I dislike Dutch! :(

You know what? I think you are really brave for making decision as such. No matter what's the outcome today, you should be really proud of yourself for standing up and doing what's the best for you and by you. Just do what you feel is the best for you and don't worry about other ppl or even your own expectations. You are an amazing woman and you are in title to do whatever you think is the best!

A bag of fruit

She came over, unexpected and we had some chat under the tree with apples and water. It went well, even I picked up some awkwardness still. Then, when we saw her again at the party, she was avoiding. I guess, she still needs some space.

"I am not in any hurry. We have time. I want you to feel safe."

I freaked out again!

You don't need to be sorry or guilty about me haven't been able to sleep in the last few days. I feel safe with you, which you have no idea how important that is for me. You have been amazing especially last night. I don't know if you could have done more or taken more care of me.

Thank you for being there and I am really lucky to have you in my life.

Firework Weekend

I can't believe that I have been playing firework for three days! There was too much smoke and too little sleep, so I took the morning off and just easily doing some overdue chore.

I can't stop smiling! So teenager! :$

I got really scared and freaked out, but I didn't say anything.

It's so Sad!

He was about to read me a short story by Patricia Grace, and I looked over his shoulders and saw "Journey" on page 192.

"192 mmm..... that's CBD!! :o " I murmured to myself.

Earlier in that morning, while we were strolling around Mt. Mangere, I was looking at airport direction and thinking....mm...that's zone 427.

P.S. I have been working on Auckland Transport Model in the last 4 months and this model divides the Auckland region into 512 zone. It's so sad that now I looked at a number, and the corresponding location in my model was the only thing came to my mind these days! :x

First Soccer Game

Yes, I had my first ever Sub Football. Okay... maybe not real soccer, but still, it was a new thing for me. I almost scored a goal today and got smashed on the face. (Not the face, you silly boy!! :S)

Score? Let's just not mention it!

Transpower Neighbourhood Engineers Award

Remember that I was doing some traffic project with those primary kids? There were two surprises today regarding to that incidentally.

My boss told me that there is going to be a special presentation to my colleague and I tomorrow to acknowledge our involvement with the community that enhances our company brand. Apparently some board members and general managers are going to be there to meet us. Pretty scary eh?

This traffic project also entered the Transpower Neighbourhood Engineer Award (open category including secondary schools throughout the country) and the award took place today in Wellington. We were notified this afternoon that the project came out at First Place!!!!

The school will receive $2000 as a reward. Futureintech and the school will notify us with the ceremonies (with local press invited again) and possibly IPENZ interview (for the magazines).

Wow...how am I going to cope with all these fame :p

10 Flights Booked!

Yay! All sorted :) , except I blowed up my budget by almost NZ$300. Oh well, seeing them all - Priceless!!

Half Marathon

I did it! I did it!!!!!!!! I stuffed up the traffic!!! Yay!

I managed to step on Harbour Bridge and conquered 21 km half marathon just under 3 hours (2 hr 49 min 16s)! It is good enough for me considering that I didn't do much training for it at all. I felt great afterwards and I knew that it was just adrenalin trick and I would collapse once I got home. And that's exactly what happened. After the shower, I was total gone. I wouldn't have got up except I was too hungry to sleep :p

I am glowing with my glory :)

"How did you go?" I asked him after I finished mine.

"I did okay. Just slightly under 2 hours (Half Marathon). However, when I came to the finish line, I was so surprised that the crowd was going crazy and people kept shouting "Well Done!" to me! Then, I saw this guy passing me and he was the first person finished the Marathon! :x Doh!"

Birthday Parties

Man...there were so many birthday parties tonight. I wish I could have cut myself into three, so I could have gone to all of them. I baked my famous chocolate cookies for him and many ppl benefit from that as when I bake, I bake more :D.

To be honest, the one I ended up going wasn't the one I wanted to go the most, but because it was organised a month ago. It was a good night out with few friends and catching up though. I had to give the dessert party a miss as I wanted to go to the other one, which would have been the highest priority if it wasn't the last minute notification. I didn't want to leave and could have crashed at his place, but I really needed a proper sleep in preparing for my half marathon on Sunday. Yay!? or Yikes!?

Making Card

I was so bored at work as all the big bosses were all in this conference, so only the lower management levels were here. I made a birthday card and I now know why I don't do it often. I could be so picky and be annoyingly perfectionist when I do designs :$ Everything has to be perfect, the colour, the margin, the pictures etc.

I hope no one will check my Internet usage today, because it's full of "goldfish", "alien", "Yoda" and "formula for perfect age range for your gf/bf". I am not going to explain the last one. I googled it for my colleagues, I swear!!

I got fired by her, or maybe I fired her; I am not entirely sure, but anyway, we came to a conclusion that we should stop seeing each other for a while :p. Thus, I officially graduated tonight after 12 sessions :)

It means a lot to me to be able to celebrate it with the person who brings all that positive green energy into my life. I am so exhausted after a stressful working day like today, but I enjoy tonight and I am happy :)

Wendys Trip

This Labour long weekend has been really satisfying. I went for a run/walk, went to see former colleague's 2 weeks young new born baby, went to Taiwan Festival on Saturday and took the whole Sunday relaxing, shopping, and tutoring. Today, we went down to Hamilton to see friends with the usual Wendys :D The girl conversation went a bit extreme from time to time that boys looked at each other silently and went back to their computer game without making any comment :$

It's so good that I didn't have to drive. I used Wendys and entertaining news to pay my share of the petrol :D

Here you go, some more reading for you :)

Sensitive Guy

"It's just wrong that a guy can be so sensitive! Annoying even, I find!" I said with anger
"Oi, but I thought girls always complain about we aren't sensitive enough" He tried to speak up for his race.

He does raise a good point though. Maybe we do complain, but when there is actually a guy who is really sensitive, we actually don't like it anymore. *Shaking head* Girls - such complicate race!

Pay it Forward

Time! 90 minute - from Devenport to the Harbour Bridge, 14 km.

We got to Devenport at 7:30 am this morning and rehearsed a trial run. I'm quite pleased with the result as my aim was to run/walk this distance within 2 hours. Next week, I'll be participate Half Marathon (starting at 6:30 am! I am not looking forwards to getting up at 5 am :x) and the only time constrain is that I have to reach the bridge by 8:30 am (the bridge will be closed for all the marathon and half marathon runners until then)

After my run, I gave a stranger a ride to Takapuna. Ever since my hitchhiking in Slovakia in 2003, I made a promise to myself that I'll have to give a ride to someone else to pay the favour forward. However, I had never felt comfortable enough to do so until today. I am glad that I fulfilled that promise :)

Welcome Back Owl

I came back from lunch and there it is - A cute little owl sitting on my desk with a note "Welcome Back, Master Anita". Again, unsigned :x

It's such a sweet gesture, but at the same time, it's killing me that I don't know who it is!! :@

Shorts

I had been looking for a pair of (cheap) shorts for the coming marathon for a while. Then, finally I got one today - a junior ones :x, a boys even :$

Back to Home Office

After being subcontracted out for 3 months, I finally come back to my home office until further notice! I can't believe how many colleagues approached me with work! Some even had to come back later as I was already fully occupied.

Within an hour back to my home office, I was already at clients to assess how we (I) can offer them assistance. Guess what? I am working over there starting tomorrow! :o So much for coming back to my office eh?!

Sailing

After nagging her for months, she finally invited me along to go sailing with her :D !!! Unfortunately, the wind was so gusty that we didn't end up racing :(. It has to be next time I guess. However, I did learn how to rigged and derigged the mistral and get to use shackles key etc. (see...it does sound like I know what I am talking about, doesn't it?)

I was still feeling a bit scared, so I hesitated with the invitation. However, I am glad that I went and explored JMS memorial and talked more about our fear to each other. The idea is slowing sinking in :)

I am trying, and trying very hard.

NOT AGAIN!!!!

I was going to see the game live this morning with them, but I was too tired from my running yesterday, so I slept in instead. When I got up, he called me and told me the news. I thought he must be pulling my leg and I didn't believe it. I heard it again from the radio and I still didn't believe until I jumped online and checked the score myself!!!!

I still remember that in 2003 I was told by the hostel staff that Aussie was beating All Black when I checked in :( . Four years later, the same thing happened???!! It's just WRONG!!! :@

Now I am sulking! :(

Oversleep

I accidentally overslept this morning by forgetting to set up my alarm!! :x I was one hour late to work. No! I didn't use my usual "I was working from home" excuse!

Mmm....Maybe I can still use Daylight Saving as an excuse? Too late? I could only use it for Monday, but not today? But...but don't you know that I am a bit s.l.o.w. ? :p

Oh wait! I did it in purpose, so we can catch up with the Melbourne office and had this conversation at 6pm our time :p Huh?? :o We are still NEARLY there with the Car Ownership Model! We have been saying that in the last 2 weeks!!! :x

Film Festival Month

Finally, the birthday rash September is over! The amount of money I spent on postage, flowers, presents and outings has finally came to the end. Just when I thought I can fix this hole in my wallet (- literally, my wallet is broken and I need a new one), I realise that October is going to be Film Festivals month for me. There are

• Documentary Film Festival (27/Sep - 3/Oct)
• Italian Film Festival (3/Oct-17/Oct)
• Irish Film Festival (23-27/Oct)

I am excited about all these film festivals especially I just met someone who fascinates different cultures and has travelled extensively. We seem to click quite well with each other :)

Oh! She didn't get married, so I officially lost the bet and I am so LOOKING FORWARDS to buying my first dress :x

5 Mountains in One Day

Mountains? :o Well....in Auckland standard... :p

• Mt. Eden
• Mt. Hobson
• St. John
• One Tree Hill
• Big King

We went mountain crawling today. It was fun and surprisingly relaxing. I am not fit at all, but that's part of the reasons I went (oh and it was his birthday too). My deteriorating arms, neck and eyesights finally had the chance to stretch, relax and exercise :)

Compliments?!

"I was supposed to say this, but kinda embarrassed to say - You still look beautiful!"

"Have you gained some weight lately?"

Apparently, both comments were supposed to be compliments. However, somehow they just do NOT sound very genuine to me at all :x

I am a Genius

I have caught up EVERYTHING in 2 days!!! I am such a genius!!

Ummm.... the down side of it is that now they know that I was mucking around for 8 weeks and they are going to expect me to be this efficient :o

日子不好混了 :p

Mid-Autumn Festival!

After feeling really stink last night, I came in early to show my dedication to fix my mistake! I worked diligently and smartly from 8am - 6:30pm with limited breaks. I am amazed and pleased with my progress today :)

After my session, I caught up with an Uni friend instead of my usual company. We chatted until quite late, but I wasn't completely knackered considering that it has been a very long day for me. I guess I was in a good spirit today with good progress at work, life and friendship :) I even paid for his drink! I must be in a good mood :p

WRONG Dataset

It wasn't nice to find out that I have been using the WRONG dataset in the last 8 weeks! :# Not when it was 5 o'clock home time!! Now, I have to rerun EVERYTHING! :( I am feeling pretty awful and stink especially it's entirely all my fault!

I think they would really want to take all those praise back now after this incident!

Darkness Purifier

It was really nice surprise to see some chocolate and moon cake sitting on my doormat when I open the door this morning :D

Thank you for the lovely message, my dear darkness purifier :)

Farewell Party

I thought I couldn't, but I managed to go to his farewell party in the end. A lot of people is great when you were hiding something as you can easily avoiding.

It was quite surreal to run into an old friend in such a function, who I haven't seen for 10 years!! He was part of first bunch of friends I made when I first came to NZ. It's quite amusing that he wouldn't want to go on a blind date with me because of his friend had a crash on me 10 years ago! Oh....memory~~ :$

Mighty Spiky!

My sweepstakes prediction has taken the biggest jump over the weekend! It picked up maximum of 15/15 points!!!

Well done Mighty Spiky! (Yes, it has a name! ;) )

No wonder my boss refused to play this year as he didn't enjoy being beaten by my Excel model last year for the Football World Cup :p I am not aiming to win, but to beat as many people as possible :)

Finally a good call, even it meant that I had to miss my bus and get home very late :)

Roses x 12

It would be nice to see people's reaction when they saw those roses and chocolate sitting on their desk. Special occasion? Not really. But if you really need a reason, here you go...

1. I promised poms to give them red roses to support their team
2. The chocolate was on special
3. It's Monday and it's depressing...
4. People can always do with some cheering up

My self-esteem has been low lately so seeing my actions brightening up other people's day means more to me than anything. Receiving those thank-you emails from UK and from work make me feel that my existence seems worthwhile.

Keep breathing, keep fighting, keep having hope... :)

WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING???!!!

"I don’t know exactly what you have been doing at Company S but three people have independently told me what a great job you have been doing! Well done."

After working at my company for one and a half year, the first time I got any official praise from the senior management is for the job that I am doing for another company! What does that tell you!! :o With such an encouragement, I put my name down for the Half Marathon challenge so I can stuff up the Auckland traffic even more as a traffic engineer :p

I then had a small Uni reunite after work, thanks to Facebook. It's funny that we were not only catching up for what we were doing after the graduation, but also during Uni. We revealed a few rumoured relationships, including mine :$. It's surprising how little we knew about each other back then :p

The High School Musical (on stage) was slightly disappointing due to the awful sound system! However, the lead singers' vocals were amazing!! I was moving with the music for the entire show (after I got over the bad sounding). Now I got sounds (and movements) stuck in my mind... I hope none of my other friends saw us singing and dancing on the streets... :p

We're all in this together
When we reach
We can fly
Know inside
We can make it

- We're all in this together, High School Musical

We’re soaring
Flying
There’s not a star in heaven
That we can’t reach

If we’re trying
Yeah, we’re breaking free

- Breaking Free, High School Musical

Man....finding red roses are as hard as finding love these days! :(

I drove around for hours, but had no success finding a bundle of good red roses. Since Germany isn't in the World Cup (Rugby), I was brainwashed by the poms and have became England supporter. Well, of course it's with the proviso that they don't end up playing against All Black (like that's likely to happen :p Shhhhhh...I am not a very good supporter, aren't I?)

Weight on Shoulders

It was the first time I have no one after my session. The anger, the disappointment, the hurt, the sadness were too overwhelming, that they overtook the usual warmth he could provide me.

He was the one helped me through my last depression. Now, he is the one triggers my depression, except that I have no other super hero with me this time :(

I think the rejection affects me more than I thought. I realised that I am actually quite vulnerable these days. I am really impatient in general, and get irritated easily. Calls get on my nerve more than usual as well. And I am afraid of asking things that I want.

And just now, I witnessed my bus driver got beaten up by three teenagers!! I am feeling angry :@ that not enough ppl doing anything to support the driver! Shamefully, I was one of them. I felt the urge that I had to do something, or I would be really upset at myself later and wish I would have had done something. Thus, I walked up to the driver and showed my compassion and gave him my business card just in case he needed some witness for the incident.

It was important for me to do something tonight as I have been feeling quite useless these days.

Flooded!

I woke up and walked into my bathroom with water all over the place! :o

I started my investigation after brushing my teeth and washing my face (Of course! I am a girl with priority :p). There has been a leakage at the bend under our hand basin. Maybe the seal need to be replaced or something. It's probably not too serious (or at least I hope not). The water is dropping at the rate of 1 ml per second. As a qualified engineer, I quickly reacted to my instinct (after my breakfast) and built a gutter to redirect the leak into a bucket.

I am so proud of my ingenuity because it works beautifully! I came home and my floor is still dry. My engineering creation is collecting more water than my dehumidifier! I am such a good engineer :D

"Reparo!"
Where is Hermione when I need her :(

Going to Work in My Pajamas

After a shift with the theme of relationships and seeing the Pillowman, I was a bit uneasy/unsettle so I totally forgot to pick up my laptop :(

So, here I am about to go to bed in my comfy pajamas and realise that I have to make a trip to my office. Should I get chanced? Nah! I can't be bothered! I hope I just don't run into anyone though! ;)

國父革命十次失敗，第十一次才成功
小女子我，沒那麼偉大！
三次足夠了！！

I Give Up! :@

I tried again

- and still no success.

However, it's amazing that nothing ever made us awkward, but trust and comfort.

Arrhhh!!! :@ I hate that when he is on my tail!!! Despite how much I dislike him, I feel sorry for him as he is such a bad communicator. He is very smart, but he can't explain things in a constructive way!

I was glad that I finished it but it was such a stressful afternoon!

However, I was lucky to be invited to their dinner. The lasagna was great at their place and I was utterly naughty and stirring as usual :p I hope they don't mind and still invite me over next time :$

"Are you ready to go? or do you want me to go down and pick her up?" He asked.

"Oh..yeah, I finish it now." said I, as I was shutting down my PC. "Oh...WAIT!...I think I will take a bit longer ;)." I turned to him and changed my mind. "Go on, go and see her first...after all it has been....how long? 66 hours?? that you two hasn't seen each other! I am not that inconsiderate even I know I am crashing for the dinner tonight :p"

"Do you want another Kiss (Baci - Italian chocolate)?" She said to him after we all had one. But before he could reply, I interrupted
"Yeah...I think he would like one, but with a real kiss at the same time ;)"

Finished Harry :)

I just couldn't put Harry down! How could I? It was midnight when I started reading the big battle! I had to finish it even it meant I will be like a zombie tomorrow!

Yeah!!! Now people can talk to be about Harry Potter :D

Patronus

EXPECTO PATRONUM!

"I can image it must be really frustrating for you at the moment. However, it is not appropriate to direct your anger at me as I am just here trying to help. I can understand your request and I am happy to transfer you as I know it's important for you to connect with someone right now. However, if you don't stop this abusive manner, I'll be forced to end this call."

Shaking

I was shaking after I ended the call... :#

People, Stuff;
Mother, Angry;
Me - Abused!

It was good that I had Harry with me to calm me down. However, 4 hours later...

- I am still shaking!

The Verdict

Disappointing :(, but understandable

He noticed my uneasiness tonight and I was surprised that how easy it is to talk to him (oh well, I have to admit that I adapted my 16 years old kid strategy). There was no conclusion, but I was really glad that we could be so open and honest to each other. We have very similar angles tackling this idea, which is really amazing.

We are again in a mirror situation, except this time we are looking at each other.

A Crazy Idea

I must spent too much time out in the cold during my exile because I have had this crazy idea :$ ever since our lunch on Tuesday. I thought it's just one of my random thoughts, but it has been in my mind longer than usual this time.

I don't think it's worth doing anything about it as he is too important to me. I am afraid this crazy idea will eventually ruin what we have.

Home Sweet home!!

After 39 hours exile, I finally step into my own house!! I am so gonna win some X'mas award for this - locking myself out of my house AGAIN :$! I was lucky to have a place for the night while I was waiting for the key. Thank to her family for the dinner, shower, warm bed, PJ, socks, toothbrush, and breakfast.

When I finally get hold on my neighbour this morning ( :o yes, I was wearing the same cloth to work for two days!), I was so relieved that I forgot to ask him to hide the key somewhere. Bad Bad Call!!!! I got home today and again couldn't get in!! :( Stars were my good friends for the last two days!

I finally get in at 9:30 pm!!!!! Oh bed, my sweet bed!!

I am Spoiled

He came in with MacDonald food, boiled some hot water for me, took me out for lunch, help me with laundry, carried 18 cans of coke for me to the beach, went skiing with us and insisted to deliver my favourite breakfast - Bacon and Egg Muffin tomorrow morning.

I felt spoiled, but I can't help but think he is going to get hurt.

Then, she said she is dropping a secret letter for me tomorrow...
Love letter, I demand ;) We will see, what exactly it is!

I did it!

I don't know how, but I did it.

I just knew that I have to do it, even every rational part of me disagreed. It's really silly or even stupid act even when I looked back now. It doesn't make any sense at all to me or anyone else, but I am glad that I went and I am proud of myself hiding behind that sunglasses. I still don't know how I am feeling. Time will tell.

And for all my dear friends,
Thank you for not asking questions;
Thank you for support emails and txts;
Thank you for being in the toilet;
Thank you for not hugging me in the office;
Thank you for disapproving my action by refusing taking me there;
Thank you for giving us the car without question;
Thank you for organising the car and driving me there;
Thank you for coming to see me and all the offering.

Thank you guys for being my friends.

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine

Did I make it that
Easy to walk right in and out
Of my life?

- Almost Lover, A Fine Frezy

I am surprised that I didn't react much last night when I found out the news.

Emotion comes and goes today, which I couldn't do anything about it like I couldn't do anything about his leaving. I don't know how I am feeling, but it has been intensive. Sad and some desire are the only two things I can name. I want to see him; I want to hug him goodbye, but at the same time I know I can't. I never expect it would be so hard.

I am pretty drunk now or I may finally have the courage to go and see you. It's not Harry I want to be in my arms tonight, but you, for the last time.

she cried and she cried, and she cried and she cried
She cried so long her tears ran dry

- L.A. Song, Beth Hart

A month Salary

How quickly can I spend all my one month salary?
2 hours! :o

How does it make me feel?
POOR!

Nowhere

I got really frustrated as I realise that I still don't know where to put him.

Nowhere seems right;
Nowhere seems suitable;
Nowhere seems to settle;
Nowhere to let it go completely...

"You don't look like someone who came in and said who was happy!"
- She seems always to bring out the worst of me

8 hours a day is hardwork!

In order to make a good impression and also due to poor public transport to my new job, I have been arriving in the office by 8 am and leave after 5:30 pm in the last couple of days. I have never worked so hard in my life!! :p

My new workspace is shared with my supervisor in an office, so my goal of opening my new snack shop here is tougher than I thought! Also, because of not being open-plan, I find it harder to socialise with others, resulting in less mucking around and more productive! During lunch break, I am on my desk most of the time to reach out the outside world. My laptop is not allowed to connect to their network, so I have to live with "Dial-up"! :o Jesus, the speed is so slow! I can't believe that I used to be able to tolerate it before broadband came to my life!

Apart from working hard, I actually really enjoy my new role here. There is a lot of new technical knowledge for me to learn and people are generally very friendly to teach me new method. My supervisor seems happy about my work and trust my ability. There are other friends, working around the same area, have already invited me out for lunch to help me explore their favorite cafes and make me feel welcome :D

Back "home", colleagues claim that it's quiet and less fun while I am away and they all miss me. In fact, I miss them them too. I am actually quite homesick, but it's a great opportunity for me to add good value in my career so I intend to work hard in the next two months.

"What?! :o You are in before 8 am??" said my colleague, with an unbelievable astonishing voice "But...but, you don't come in until 9 am here! or even later!"

Helloooo~~~ Harry!

"Am I sleeping with Harry tonight?" I asked wickedly ;)
"Yes" was the answer.

So, here I am, having Harry in my arms and am looking forwards to an amazing night! Though, I think I should ban him from my bedroom, because I could see myself with a very little sleep from now on.

My Bunny in Shiny Armour

He told her off and asked her to leave me alone. I know that he wants to be my knight in shiny armour and protected me but the truth is I don't need him to shield me from gossip. I INVENTED it! Remember?!

The Power of Red

I have been suffering from neck pain for months, so I thought I'll go and buy a new pillow!

Surrounding by so many different types and prices pillows, I was lost. After looking around for a while, I made up my mind to choose this one - simply because it was in a RED package! Yeah, why not! When you have no idea which one to choose, any indication is better than nothing! Oh! Then I found out that the red one was also having a 30% off sale and it ended up to be the best value pillow!!! See, follow the power of red is right!!

I also needed some strong muscle men to help me move my dead best friend - TV, so I sent out the request. In a minute, I had 100% successful responses and they were all keen on help me! Thank you guys!! Now I just need to cook a pot of chicken curry to feed this army!

"Buddy, do you want my TV? I can swap mine (29") with yours (21") " said my buddy with his usual innocent smile. "Or, you can take mine and I'll go and buy a smaller one for myself!"

- What a cute buddy I have! :D

The End

He was running late, so I went wondering around the market and bought some wool socks for my cold feet. How come I have never thought about this idea before! It feels so good and warm!!!! :)

Tonight, we went to see Perfume: The Story of A Murder first. It's actually quite a main-stream film, I found. It's a thrilling story about this guy killing women to make the best/powerful perfume in the world. My heart went with him totally and didn't mind the killing at all. The music was really appealing too.

We then had few hours to kill before our next film, so we went to have some dinner. He tried to tell me how wrong it is to go to Denny's when his friend organising a night out. It was quite hard for me to understand his point as food is food and as long as I am not cooking it, I enjoy any food generally speaking. However, when he started using "Shoes" as an analogy, it made much more sense strangely!

Anyway, the LAST of my eight film festival movies is a Korean film - No mercy for the Rude. (Any loyal reader wants to take my challenge to list them all? ;)) It's in a quite bloody and cute kind of way. I think I have to watch more of this direction's films to understand his style more. After the film it was almost midnight and I was really tired, but I decided we should go to Denny's so I can experience what he meant as I had never been to Denny's. Well, I still think the place is okay, but now I sort of can relate to his feeling. It's like when you are looking for a pair of shoes, sometimes, the style, the price, the colour, the size and the comfort aren't all that perfect for you. When that happens, it's really annoying! Apparently, it's like that for him. When he is looking for a nice night out with friends, going to Danny's is just too disappointing.

By the time, I drop him back to his car, it was really late and I was absolutely too exhausted to go anywhere but home (Universe has a mystery way loving me!). Then his surprising sniffing my neck gave me a stun as we hugged goodnight to each other.

"What's that for?" I said with a puzzled expression on my face. "You know," smiled he with a child-like grin, "like the movie Perfume :p"

"No...we aren't going to get you alcohol tonight! Not after what I heard about what happened to you last time!"
"Oh..nononon. We better get you out of here. You were right! You does have some gambling problem!"

- I DO NOT have a drinking or gambling problem. Really!

Once

He introduced me to the soundtrack first and the songs have been growing on me. Thus, when we found out that the movie itself is part of the film festival, we bought the tickets straight away without hesitation. The film was really low budget, the storyline was average, but now the movie gave the music a different dimension to me and I love them even more. I am going to learn to play some of my favorite songs from the movie, such as Falling Slowly, The Hill et. I really love Marketa Irglova's voice.

To my surprise, she talked in Czech in this film and it was great to laugh before the translation came!!!! They must use an easier dialog in this film than I Serve the King of England which I found very difficult to understand.

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

- Glen Hansard, Falling Slowly

Being Famous

This is what I am up to with my 14 kids. And yes, they kindly didn't put my age there. It's 17 if anyone is wondering :p

As you can see, my colleague had a bad hair day, so his job was talking to the reporter and mine is to look pretty in the photo. What do you think? Do you think I did a good job :p

Our section has been in the press quite a bit this year. First the Herold, Asianz, IPENZ newsletter, and then the local newspaper. This celebrity ripple continues when my TV reporter friend called me up and asked whether or not she can do a story on me ... :$

He gave me a call from Germany and we chatted for like an hour or so to confirm our reunite. I am getting really excited about my holiday now. I have booked 7 segments so far. I am still working on my aim - 10 flights with a budget of NZ$3000.

He said I better start working on my fitness for my holiday - Drinking that is :$

Happy Working Day

It's a happy working day today because my boss approved my 7 weeks holiday!!! Now, I can add Macua and Melbourne into my trip!!

10 flights, 8 countries, 7 weeks and many friends :$

They are also sending me to the other consultancy for two months starting next Monday :D It's great as things with Mr. Bunny is getting awkward.

"No Harry to sleep with tonight :( "

Slovak and Taiwanese Films

I went to see two brilliant films today!!

She and I were still astonished that this Czech/Slovak film (I Serve the King of England) made it to the Civic theater while we were sitting down. We couldn't believe it was even a sold out!! :o I mean... who watched Slovak film?! However, It was very well done, well acted and very witty. I couldn't help but clap a bit during the film because it was so brilliant and beautiful. There was no plain bits and it made everyone laugh. The audience gave a big clap when it finished.

Right after the film, I went to see Tsai Ming-liang's film - I Don't Want to Sleep Alone. I am quite used to his style by now, which normally means, no dialog and no background music. I could understand that it could be hard for the general audience to enjoy it, but I got really irritated when this girl sitting next to me kept flipping her cellphone and txting. In the end, I got angry and told her off! :@ There were also two couples sitting around me kept talking... Jesus! I mean I can understand it's not everyone's cup of tea, but if you don't enjoy it, just get out rather than annoying others like me from enjoying it!!

Apart from the annoying immature audience, this film again blew my mind as this director has always been. I didn't get the essence of the film until the credit came up, and then I went WOW!! :o It made so much sense after I saw the credit. This film is so brilliant and so deep!! The more I think about it now, the more "wow" I go!

Priceless

When they moved out last year, I bought me a bean bag - $99
When she moved out this year, I bought a dehumidifier - $279
Being alone and having my own space - PRICELESS :D

P.S. Except the price of freedom is getting expansive... :p

Busy Bee

• A film festival movie (Climates);
• A play (The Crucible); and
• Two Birthday parties.

It has been a full-on day, but very enjoyable :D

However, The reality kicked in when he started talking about his future plan at the last party. Maybe I was just tired, but I got a bit sad as it has been a pleasure to have him walking beside me - making me laugh, making me comfortable, and making me feel wanted. I am now not as vulnerable as I was and maybe it is time I learn not to rely on him so much.

The Death of the President

This pure fictional documentary was really well done. I almost started believing what I was watching. The acting and editing were amazing. However, I didn't enjoy that much because it was so real that it felt like watching a 2 hour news and I lost interest after one hour.

After the little cocktail incident last time, I made sure I didn't have any alcohol this time. But I learned that a full stomach also put me into sleep... :p

Goodbye

I wish I could say goodbye with the brightest smile, because that's how I want you to remember me. But, the truth is - I still love you too much that I just couldn't pull it off without a tear.

"Would saying goodbye make him any more or less gone?"
"I will teach you the arms of a friends that you can turn to whenever you have need."

Breakfast

It's not quite the breakfast in bed, but I am quite happy with the breakfast at office, especially after a tossing and turning night like last night.

Did you hear that? No?
Did you see that? No?

I KNOW!!!! There is no one!!!!

It's once again MY place and MY bean bag! :D

Yay! :$

After the Wedding

This movie was very moving and touching. However, it's not going to be the only thing I will remember for the rest of my life.

I passed out!! :o

Yes, I passed out when I was watching the film! :x A crazy night out, empty stomach and a cocktail (yum though! Lychee liqueur, Stolichnaya Vodka with crushed ice & cranberry juice) just didn't go too well with me.

To be honest, I was a bit frightened and thinking of calling for help when I started feeling "floating" and "empty" like a dementor was sucking all my happiness out, but it was too late. The alcohol/tiredness kicked in before I could react. I felt I was having a seizure or something, because I couldn't control my eyes and my head. The gravity just took its cause. I went - Dooh! and was knocked out completely at once.

It was pretty embarrassed though afterward to tell him what happened in order to find out how much I missed out the film. Fortunately, I only lost my conscious for about 30 seconds and didn't miss that much of the film :p

"Expansive?" I asked
"Nah. It's reasonable."
"Hang on! How much is the main?"
"About $30." He said

" :x :x :x No wonder they call you 鑽石王老五 (Mr. Single with diamond) I am glad that I asked! Stop! My choice then." We turned around and went to where I can afford it.

The Ball 2007

I was so prepared for this year's ball. I had my dress, partner, stylist and driver (they no longer trust me after last year's incident :x ) booked a month ahead! :D

The food was so-so and the band/music was bad, but the dancing floor was hot! I have never had so much fun on the dancing floor. I danced like one of those girls whom I always admire and wish I could be, who seems so confident of her body movement, who does not care what other people think of her, and who just loosely flirts with others to have a bit of fun :$

I taught some of them some Cerec moves and I even thought him to do a drop without hurting myself! He promised me that he will learn more by next year. He better! After all, I am not going to be his 2nd wife forever! ;)

Walk Out!

We sat down at 7:30pm and we didn't get our tapas until 9pm. Then there was still no sign of our mains at 10pm! That's it! Hunger made me grumpy! By that time, I've lost my appetite already. I was too tired to be polite and walked out the restaurant straight away :@

"So-and-so, call Pizza Hut and Order 6 piazzas! The rest of you, my place. Now!" I gave orders soon we left the place!

In an hour, I fed 14 people in my place! :o Gee! The power of hunger is amazing! Oh! And I kicked everyone out by midnight because it's the ball tomorrow ;)

Make sense? Totally!

I am surprised that how much it makes sense to my friends when I first said,
"When I cut him out of my life, I suddenly don't need as much support."

I thought I needed certain amount of support/love in general to help me go through this difficult time of my life and I thought by letting him go, I would be devastated and would need to fill that huge hole in my life. However, in fact, the support/love I need is NOT confined. I now feel so free, so empowered that I don't need much in my life; therefore, I am once again happy about who I am.

And there are friends who are constantly there checking on me and I feel my love tank is easily overflowed these days. Thank you, guys!

Harry Potter 5

I'm in Happy Harry Land!!!!!! Yay!!! :D "Harry! Harry! Harry!"

I can't wait for the last book to come out!!!

I was surprised how my perspective towards some friends changed dramatically based on this new piece of information I received tonight at the gallery.

Now, I am aware this shift of my perception; I am just working on shifting it back.

見山是山，見水是水
見山不是山，見水不是水
見山還是山，見水還是水

mountains are mountains and water is water
mountains are not mountains and waters is not water
mountains are once more mountains and water is water

Original:
Before a man studies Zen, to him mountains are mountains and water is water; after he gets an insight into the truth of Zen through the instruction of a good master, mountains to him are not mountains and water is not water; but after this when he really attains to the abode of rest, mountains are once more mountains and water is water.

- Buddhism

Half Sold out???

I went to buy 6 Film Festival movie tickets for me and friends today, which were just half of my wish list. The other half would depend on whether or not I can find time to squeeze them in.

To my surprise :-o , the Slovak film we want to see were half sold out already! Those are just the presale tickets! The Festival has not even started it yet!! Seriously, who watches Slovak film?? :p This year I'll be watching the slovak film with a slovak again :D

AHB closed

Apparently the traffic is stationary on the motorway due to the storm hitting Auckland. A state of emergency was declared in the Far North. It was a fierce fight against the strong gusty wind and at the same time dodge half hanging traffic signs and flying miscellaneous things around me :#

WHAT? The Auckland Harbour Bridge is CLOSED? How am I getting home tonight?! I hope Spiderman will find a way dropping me home later.

P.S. We didn't have hot water for two days until 11pm on Thursday. I had to boil hot water to have shower! It's amazing how little water I actually need for a shower!

Spiderman Ripple Effect

Life has made a turn for good in the last few days... :D

He made the decision not to support me and I made the decision not to see him ever again. I think we both made the best decision for me. My heart still ached when I went to play squash and watched Harry Potter4, but surprisingly, I took it better than I thought I would be.

I think this weekend can even be described as Happy, which has been out of my dictionary for a long time. When he chose to close the door and walked out on me, others open windows for me. I got many sweet friends who wrote me emails and invited me out. They all cutely quoted "I am not taking no as an answer!" It's just really sweet.

Happy things this weekend,

• I am baking again... It normally means I am happy
• A postcard from Finland
  
• A cheap(er) ticket arranged to Europe
  
• Playing squash
• Bought myself a pair of gloves for my holiday/skiing
  
• Harry Potter Marathon (watching all 4 movies in preparation for the premiere of the fifth one)
• Brunch in Mission Bay
  
• Picking up my ball dresses.

On top of that, there are Mr. Bunny (a.k.a Mr. You Jump I Jump), Mr. Buddy, and Mr. Mechanics entertaining/stirring my life and keep me amused.

桃花

First the " You jump, I jump";
Then the " Six weeks or Six months";
Then the mechanics kept saying "小姐，妳好靚" :$

最近走什麼桃花啊？！

What I have learned...

Lesson 1: Different level of Depression
I realise today that there are different levels of depression. My latest one is so bad that I just hide alone and push everyone away. However, the more lonely I get, the more depressed I feel and the harder I shut ppl out. Self-punishment I guess.

Lesson 2: Pushing Friends Away
It seems that friends who know me the longest, the further I push them away. Maybe it's because

• They know me so well that they know I am not well;
• I don't want them to see my vulnerable side;
• I don't want them to carry my burden or worry about me;
• I don't want them to think I am manipulative or just want some attention;
  
• I don't want them to pity me; and/or
  
• I have gone through too much emotion myself, and when I am with my friends, I just want a break, a rest and a get-away.
  

Lesson 3: New Way to Help People in Depression
There are few exceptions who manage to get through that concrete wall I built and become my life-support. I can't help but notice those exceptions happen to be those whom I just meet in the last 12 months. There is less baggage between them and me, I guess. I feel more willing to take up their offers than old friends. It's probably because I am more polite to new friends, so I don't tend to shut them out abruptly. Also they don't know how I deal with my problems in the past. Thus, they don't easily give up and have been obsessively checking on me. In the last couple of weeks, I have been acting very passively and making no effort on anything. Whoever is leaving me alone, I just let it be; whoever is asking me out or caring me, I just let it be too. Thus, their noisy carings happen to be exactly what I need. From them I learn a new way to help others in depression. I know that it definitely works for me and make me realise that sometimes it's okay to just take the person in depression out and not have those lovey-dovey compassion talk. When they are ready to talk, they will. It's much more important to be pushy and get them shift focus first. Leaving someone alone may not be the best way or work for the serious depression.

MEREDITH: Too often, the thing you want most is the one thing you can't have. Desire leaves us heartbroken, it wears us out. Desire can wreck your life. But as tough as wanting something can be, the people who suffer the most, are those who don't know what they want. (Grey's Anatomy, 2007)