Friday, September 23, 2005

Expectation

He is just a friend!

He is just a friend!

No expectation!!
No expectation!!

Why does it have to be so hard!!!
Why does it have to be so hard!!!

Energy bubble shield!!!!
Energy bubble shield!!!!

He couldn't understand how I feel as he has never gone through what I have gone through. I was vulnerable, in need and had too much expectation from him so I forgot that all the emotions were coming from me and I am the only one be able to resolve how I felt, not him. I was expecting too much from him, and I forgot that he is only an individual and he doesn't necessary understand me.

It's not his time or place yet and maybe he isn't meant to go through what I went through at all. All the suffering I was going through has a meaning in my life. It may have seen to be a total disaster or mistake at the time but over time, I start to see the same thing with different perspective. I now see them as something I'll be glad to have in the future. They can either/both helped me to develop my potential or/and help other.

It's a gift that be able to understand other's pain and I have been lucky enough to go through few in my journey with many others. Hopeful, I'll be wiser then and help many others in the future. He was surprised that I was able to understand where he is coming from. I guess because I would have had the same reaction or even worse if he asked me something like that 4weeks ago. Maybe he is more mature than I am in certain ways that he didn't ask me that question.

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