My first week at work

The first week has been really fast and fantastic!! Ppl at the office are really nice to me and the projects that I am working on are all interesting. However, just ask me again in a month time (Humm...that would be the paid day or actually try in 2 months) and don't be surprised that I may give you the totally opposite answer :P

I also have more confidence now in my abilities at workforce after a week. My multi-culture background, board knowledge/interests, variety of life experience and cheerful personalities make it easier than ever to network with all sort of different ppl. I feel very comfortable at work even I know the least of what transportation is all about. I am very satisfied/surprised at myself picking up everything so quickly and methodically. My 6 years E-sci training has been proven to be very handy and relevant at work! It gives me the easy attitude towards any software packages and modelling consideration. On top of that, the Masters training helps me ask the crucial/right questions and allow me to absorb all the concepts at once. To my surprise, my Slovakia project management experience has been also very useful in all the file management and administration stuff!!

Getting up so early and taking the bus to work everyday don't bother me at all. In fact, it has always been my favourite time of the day since my university life. It doesn't matter either I let my thoughts wander around freely or ponder some issues in my life. Most of important thing is, I spend some time with myself alone!! Of course, there are few things that I find very annoying and am still trying to get used to. I don't mind dressing up everyday (I rather enjoy it), but I hate ironing. Actually, I am helpless to do ironing myself! Wearing uncomfy shoes also gets me! Why can't everyday being the Global Casual Dress Day :(

I feel like writing a short update of this significant week, because there were so much happening...

• Monday - First day at work! I love my buddy! She is very sweet (was using 'nice', but apparently, it became too cliche because I describe everyone I liked for first impression 'nice'!) and gave me a super detailed introduction. She is a German! That's probably why she is so nice :P. I also received two txt messages from friends to check on my first day at work. Thank you, guys.

• Tuesday - Learning transportation modelling package was fun! However, I was also feeling very exhausted in that evening already and the week was still not even half way yet!! I blamed the shoes! Actually, the real reason that made me a bit depressed was I found myself got lost in a huge crowd during the company annual function. The feeling of not fitting in a group was back. You thought after so much moving around and changing environments, you will find a better and better way to deal with this feeling, but NO! It was as hard/awkward as my first time of changing school. I escaped from the event and run away clumsily with my buddy. The loneliness made me miss someone so much and that upset me even more. That night, the person unblock me in MSN and said 'hello' to me out of the blue though. It made me feel slightly better.

• Wednesday - Hello! Sunrise! It was a long day as I had to do my first site visit at 7am. I had seen 5000 Aucklander stories at a glance in 6 hours. The traffic survey wasn't a rocket science, but I got to watch the traffic for 6hours. It reminded me the person that I used to watch traffic with. I missed the time we had with some fresh bread from the nearby bakery. It also refreshed my memory of few ppl that I used to watch girls passing by and gave rating out of 10. I missed them. There was no cloud at all and my new sunglasses became very practical indeed. I also learned to appreciate the speed limit sign as it was the only shade that was available for the entire day. I shifted along the shadow playing my own hide (in the shadow) and see (the traffic). The truck drivers liked to say hi to me, which often gave me a fright. Their friendly gestures - honking, made me feel like I am part of transportation, so I kindly waved back to them :) Sitting on the concrete barrier, however, was such a pain in the butt (literally!)
  

• Thursday - Starting my first real modelling project in Tauriko! I run into an old friend outside of my company, who I hadn't seen for a year! He kept asking me what happened to me coz I apparently looked great (I guess, my business woman outlook with my straight hairs can fool so many ppl), then I run through all the possible reasons until he was satisfied. His nearly offensive black-humour personal attack made me so stunned that I didn't know how to reply like always. Hopefully, we can find some other time to have a drink or dinner to have a proper catch up next week. Like a date? You never know ;) I also received an email from Spain who I haven't had a contact with since last May. Today was a lost&found friends day!

• Friday - Yeah, no uncomfy shoes coz it's casual Friday!! I thought I would have to say byebye to all my long breaks and long lunch after I start working, but today we had morning tea which ppl take turns to bring different sweet and savoury food, then I had a 2hours lunch with my new colleagues and there was the Friday drink. However, I worked very hard for the rest of the day at another project and billed them all to our client. My hourly rate isn't cheap!

Memory folder

昨夜，相思是蠶 (Last night, missing was like a silkworm )
而我是那桑葉 (And I was that mulberry leaf)

- A quote that I liked a lot since senior high school

There has been a few letters, cards and postcards cumulating everywhere in my room since I came back from Slovakia in 2004. It was time to dust and put them away, I thought, as I am about to start another new page of my life - working, tomorrow.

I read through my love and frindship traces in the last two years and sorted them by name and time. There are people who left me, who are still continuesly walking beside me for many years, who rejoined my journey again, and of course who start new exciting pages in my memory folder. I really appreicate everyone who were part of my life in the last two years. All those memory are either joyful, proud, enlighting, depressing, frustrating, agnry, painful, or hurt, but they are all priceless to me. Each page tells a wonderful story. Some are still too heavy or sensitive to touch and some which I know no more messages are going into. Sadly, it's time to seal them and put them away. Time will heal all the negative emotions and the next time when I reopen my memory folder, they will be just a part of stories amount others.

Meanwhile, I would like to quote one of the messages that I recived to thank all who loved/love me and be part of my life journey for either bring me lessons or joys. Thank you for being there.

Some things are worthwhile
No matter what they cost.
The memories alone are priceless.
You are worthwhile.

- A lost love

Hamilton Trip

"Can you bring Wendy when you come to visit us?" She asked.
"Wendy? Do I know any Wendy?" I was very puzzled.
"Yes, Wendy's, the burger!!"

That's right, there is no Wendy's in Hamilton and they haven't had it for more than a year!! So my mission to Hamilton had never ever been so important and meaningful. Not only I can expand my safety driving territory and visit friends, but also bring down 4 burgers and nuggets WARM!! The driving was very pleasant except it was a bit hard to keep the speed under 120km/hr. The food was delivered with love and warmness (literally!) after one and a half hours and I had the best Wendy's ever because I was eating it them. I am glad that I took the trip down as I had a very fun and educated afternoon to catch up. I also learned so much about the World of War (Computer game), car, driving technique, cheese, milk, lemon&honey tea, hip replacement and sex education (Yeah, with the textbook illustration! Very informative!!)

I had to leave before it all got too dark because I can't see at night. Besides, I needed to see my patient back in Auckland as the irresponsible Love Doctor. After an hour consultation dinner, I decided to go home, even though I was also invited to sing Karaoke and play badminton. However, I was a bit tired after this long day (Silly Wendy's doesn't open until 10am, which made me wait for an hour until it opened!).

Yeah!! It's great to visit friends!
Yeah!! It's even better to drive alone to Hamilton and back without killing anyone on the road :)

Going once, going twice...ANITA SOLD!

After consulting with various friends and family constantly around the world this week, I finally made the decision of who I should sell myself to. I will start my first real job next Monday and I look forwards to this new page of my life.

During the last 2 weeks, I have realised a couple of things. First, how many similarities between a job and a relationship and how much you can learn from one to the other. For example,

1. Job v.s. Partner hunting
2. Company research v.s. Finding out more about the persons who you may be attractive to.
3. Showing the interest by either having a vacancy ads or the cold letters to companies v.s. Asking ppl out for the first dates. Of course, it's totally ethical to show multiple interests in different companies/candidates/girls/guys at this stage.
4. Job v.s. Love CV. I just thought it would be interested to write a Love CV where instead of having the Work Experience section, you have a Love Experience where you put down the dates, and some description about your previous relationships. Of course, you need to spend some time to work on your Love CV to make sure you sell yourself well and you have learned so much from them.
5. Interview v.s. Date. Making sure you feel equal and comfortable with the other party during the interview/date. It's not only for the other party to get to know you, but also for you to find out more about the other party.
6. Reference checking v.s. Finding more about your date by asking his/her friends.
7. Job offer v.s. Would you like to be my boyfriend/girlfriend. Sure, now things get more serious and exciting, and it's time to make the decision. Would you like to make the commitment with the other party now or maybe there are jobs/someone better going to happen to you latter? So, you take some time to compare all the pros and cons of all your offers and decide what's the best for you.
8. Contract and review v.s. Love contract and love review. It's another thing that I thought it would be cool to have in a relationship. You can negotiate what you want from the relationship and how you like to be rewarded. And the best of all, you can renew your love contract every now and then. You also need to review your relationship often. Whether or not both parties are happy with each other is important! Are you ready to take the relationship to the next level?
9. Resignation v.s. Breaking up. Both need a great deal of maturity from both parties.
10. Bottom line is there is no such thing as a perfect job or a perfect partner. It's all about whether or not you are compatible with the other happily. If you stop learning and growing, it's time for you to move on. After all, NZers on average change their jobs 7 times, while the average number of partners is 10.5 around the world.

Okay, that came out unexpected! Let's get back to the other three important things that I actually benefited from my decision making this week. First, I found decision making simulation technique very useful. It was basically how I made my decision in the end. I picked one choice and see how much I like/hate that decision. Secondly, when I evaluated all the pros and cons of my job offers, I found out that I really want to go back to Europe at some stage. The company that I chose in the end, has less advantage in that concept, but as far as I am concerned now, it's all about being good at my field; I believe that I can easily find another job with my skills in Europe when the right time comes. Last but the most precious, I value all my friendships more than I knew. Two of my best friends are working at one of my job offer companies and I have never thought it would weight so much on my decision making. The last thing I would like to do is to jeopardise my friendships by working in the same team with them.

Anyway, here are the three main reasons that I took the job.

1. I like transportation more than environmental engineering.
2. I get along with this manager better. (I am scared of the other one slightly coz he doubted my English ability in both interviews.)
3. This job offers me a better benefit package overall. (It has nothing to do that they offer me a window seat!! Really!)

Me, too

I thought hearing someone called me the Love Doctor is pretty random, but I was wrong. The conversation that I had with my friend today was even weirder.

"Wow!! Look at you! You are amazing! You look so good and happy," That was what she said to me when we met up for a coffee. "What is new? What happened to you?"

"Huh? Am I?" I wasn't doing anything with my outfit as I was just being....me.
"Breaking up?!" (If that's the answer she was looking for...) *Eye-rolling*

"Me, too!!" She exclaimed with joy and excitement.
"Huh?" That was by far the strangest but the coolest response I have ever seen/imaged about hearing breaking up. "Oh My God?! You too?"
"Yeah!! Isn't it wonderful? I am so happy for you!!" Okay, that's just too outside-the-box thinking!

"When did you break up?"
"February."
"Me, too!!" This time was me exclaiming with joy and excitement.

The next thing I know, we were screaming and hugging at the Starbucks to celebrate (?) the news.

It's such a weird but joyful afternoon!

The last day of the summer

I finally went to Rangitoto Island for tamping after living in Auckland for almost 10 years. The weather was brilliant and the three companions were very pleasant to be annoyed by my are-we-there-yet trick. Sorry guys :P. I wasn't fit as you all would have expected if you have ever unfortunately gone tramping or playing sports with me, but they were all patient enough to wait for my enjoying-scenery-breaks. Those dark lava caves were my favourite. You can see nothing when we were crawling in there. We finally reached the top and I remembered why I keep coming back tramping - the breathtaking view (+ the long break they finally gave me and the food).

Under our Time-keeper's strict supervision , we got back to the ferry on time and had a few "friendly" card games on the way back to the city. Then, it's time to reveal the secret of bubble tea which my companions were so curious about from my blog. We had fun in that restaurant, with bubble tea investigation, magical crystals lost-and-found, and that never-ending table football until we almost lost the coin!!

I was exhausted after my shower, but I felt like having a quiet night with some friends coming over. It was organised as a DVD night, but we never got around to it. It was a very open minded evening with 2 open minded girls. We were there for each other's problems without judging until 3am when we barely had energy to continue a sentence. I knew it was time for the EVIL Absinth!! I played my favourite trick with sugar and fire for her and then I had a sip. Yuck! I forgot how disgusting this drink is!!

Just before we all agreed to go to bed, she said to me
"Anita, you are like a Love Doctor!"
"Huh? Why?" I was humble by that compliment.
"Because you seem to have all the answers for relationships." She continued.

The daylight saving ended that night and I have/was acknowledged what a big step I have taken in my life and how much I have grown in the last 4 months. I went to bed with a grin that night.

Goodbye, Summer!

Making a pact with the angel

I wasn't so panic or surprised when I found out that I lost my cellphone. After all, I have already had few sad days and nothing could upset me more. In a way, I was hoping it would be a turning point of my rollercoaster mood swing - a new start with my social life. I am sure the movie was really good because I was very lost. Anyway, my knowing kong-fu friend was kind enough to go back with me to the Albert Park where I was reading and helped me look for my phone after dark. Well, we didn't find it.

I got home and found the door highly secured - double locked and a chain. There was only my brother's gf home and she told me that some kiwi guy called for finding my cellphone in the park. She was scared because my brother gave him our address and then went out. I wasn't relieved nor disappointed, but tranquil about the whole thing. I wasn't so sure whether or not I wanted my phone back. I was only taking the ride passively without any emotion influences. We waited for two days without hearing further news about my cellphone as my brother didn't ask his contact detail.

Then, I remember what I was thinking on the bus home that evening. I was about to make a pact with the devil/angel. I was going to give up on something, if I could get my phone back. Thus, I rethought the pact and modified it to something is still hard to achieve, but good for my soul. I think I was dealing with the angel as what I am giving up is something really disgraceful.

"Sis!! Your phone is in the mailbox!!" That was the result on that evening. How freaky!

However, now I have my phone back. I start thinking what a pity!! I had those fantasies to meet this nice angel guy, but he only drop it in our mailbox anonymously. My knowing kong-fu friend thinks that was my plan all along and I should try car crashes next time, then I can get their address detail as well :P. I may take up his advice. It depends on how desperate I am. After all, cellphone is much cheaper than fixing cars!!

Taiwan Trip

I went back to Taiwan for 3 months and it was a life changing experience which has more effect on me than my 1 year in Europe. It wasn't so easy to grow 5 years old within 3 months, but I was forced to. A lot of my believes and values were completely destroyed and got rebuild again. They are what I believe more healthier and completed. Some of the processes came unexpected or even brutal. I had to learn them in a hard way, but it makes me a more understanding person now. I have found myself once again with wisdom and confidence.

It has been exactly one month since our breaking up. I have gone through blaming myself, feeling gutted, wanting to give it another try, moving on, finding out some news, feeling angry/betrayed/hurt/cheated, trying to be friends, trying to be a bigger person than I really am by giving my blessing, feeling very foolish, despising his disgrace behaviour, facing my real emotions and then now moving on with my own life. I thank all my friends who have supported me in all different ways in the last month. You help my healing by simply being there to listen, to provide me with your shoulders and wisdom, and to be more furious/shocked than I am. And I just love some of your first reactions! :)

Being alone doesn't equal to be lonely, I've found. Life is all about experiencing different things and be honest with yourself. It is his lose that he didn't get the chance to know the new me, but there is nothing keeping me from moving on now. I have been honest with him and myself for making all the effort in the last month. For me, that's all the matter. There are so many challenges that I was planning to add to my life and I have found the joy of fulfilling most of them by myself since I came back.

* 3 exhilarating job interviews + 1 job offer
* Gathering with the Taiwanese gang
* Driving to Bay of Plenty with my failed car warrant and catching up with the AIESEC gang
* Summer Shakespeare- The Comedy of Errors
* Been a candy Santa to catch up with the Bio gang
* Classic Comedy Show. I love Sam Wills! He made me laugh again
* Get involved with Youthline
* Library books by Paulo Coelho, Jostein Gaarder, Roald Dahl, C. S. Lewis
* Paid my vehicle license fee and get my Warrant of Fitness finally
* Organising 2 movie outings and 3 lunch dates for the coming week

I am sure the achievement list is getting longer and longer as I am also going to see Auckland Theater Company - Wheeler's Luck, dress shopping&girl's night and a lunch date in the next 3 days. I am looking forwards to my life and sharing them with all of you who care enough to read this blog.

ps. Oh~ If I ever lose my mind and am jumping into another relationship in the next 6months, please slap/hit me or kill that person :P

Salon

I finally understand why do girls go to salon after breaking up, because it's F**KING long! I almost died on that chair!! 6 hours!! Gee...!! I was very chatty at the beginning, but after 6hours cut, wash, dry, soft, steam, wash, dry, protect, wash, dry, perm, set, wash, dry, protect, wash, dry, perm, more cut, phew.... I was just so starving and tired that I just wanted it to finish in the end.

Why is it good for the girl who has just breaking heart? First, it gets her out of the sad alone house/computer to be in publish, so she can stop crying. Secondly, the ordered instructions can shift her attention. Thirdly, the walking around and the waiting make her very tiring so the only thing she can think of is getting out of there. Besides, looking at yourself in the mirror for 6hours is just a torture in any normal circumstances, especially the one that the breaking heart girl looking at is a depressed and pathetic one and make her realises how unattractive she has become. Then, she can spend more money and make herself look more pretty(?), well, at least different. Finally, there are instructions that she needs to follow to keep the new hairstyle, so she has less time to sorrow.

Well, I think the most important reason is that changing the outlook makes the girl feel that she has done something and wish the better look will bring her a better mood.

I went to the shop to exchange the top I bought few days ago. Why? because I under estimated how fast I have GROWN in the last 3 months in Taiwan :(

Immediately, my eyes were caught by someone, who looked really familiar and beautiful with a very fashionable denim jacket. I couldn't help myself but stared at this young smart-looking lady for few seconds before I realised I was watching her so blunderingly. Then suddenly I recognised who she was -

It's ME in the mirror !!!

夠勁爆吧！

敗家大血拼

Before I start earning money, I have been wastrel...

I was so exhausted that I had no energy to say a single word, but lying on the lounge and looked dead by the end of my clothes shopping yesterday. What they say about shopping was true. I was depressed and desperate in the morning, but once I started shopping, I forgot everything...(Well,it's not totally true. I had a special friend who helped me walk out of my self-rebuke first.)

How much did I spend? Just say it was tremendous for someone as penny-pinching as me. Actually I wasn't too anguished about my wallet because it's just numbers I put on my credit card. Besides, I was spending NZ government money and those TW prices meant very little to me. Just WAIT until I see the bill! I will probably faint!!

I didn't sleep much last night because I was too excited about my 戰利品 (shopping loot/booty). I was tossing from side to side for the whole night because I was thinking/worrying about how to wear them when I go to what occasions and with whom etc etc. Pretty busy that night!

The worst part of this shopping is that I found out that I am one size up. Dame you 珍珠奶茶 (bubble tea) and 鹹酥雞 (spicy crispy chicken). Those disgusting superfluous greasy FAT made me look humongous! Even my Mum who used to think it's ridiculous that I wanted to lose weight in the past, has suggested me for the first time that I should do so.

新年快樂~ (Happy Chinese New Year!)

My being fond of eating situation didn't get better but worse during Chinese New Year~ I was very excited, like I have euphoria for few days and my eating pattern had became a joke amount my cousins and nieces by the end of 圍爐 (Chinese new year eve dinner).

I was walking with my Mum as she wanted some 圓仔冰 (shaved ice). I didn't had any, coz I had already had some of my favourite 雪花冰 (snow flake ice). I really like Chinese New Year in Taiwan, because the atmosphere was so happy and busy everywhere. My stomach suddenly was craving for 哪種拜拜用的糕仔 (special powdery coin-size cakes for worshiping ancestors) so I started looking for them. After a couple of stalls, I finally found one who was selling it.

"How much do you want?" The young owner asked me kindly.
"Er..err...Can I just have....3?" I felt so embarrassed to even ask.
"...Huh? Oh...Okay..." I am sure he was surprised that someone would buy so little. "In that case, don't worry about the money. How much do you want? Is it enough?" He put a handful of those powdery cakes into a plastic bag.
"Err...that's more than enough! Are you sure you aren't gonna take my money?" I was so embarrassed that I wanted to dig a hole on the ground and hided!
"Here you go. Happy New Year!!" He gently passed the bag to me with a big smile and refused to take any money from me.
"Thank you so much!! Happy New Year to you too, Sir!" I said with my face red!

Then, I started enjoying the powdery cakes that I always enjoy during new year, except this year it had a rather embarrassing story behind it. Before I finished them all, I saw the jerk stall with those sweet dry meat and my stomach again was crying out "I want it!!". I was trying to grab my Mum to come with me, but she used the excuse of the busy traffic, so I had to cross the street alone. My guess would be she had found the previous conversation rather embarrassing and she knew that I was going to do it again! And...she was right~

"Hey...can I just buy very little?" Here I was, asking my 101 shameful question again.
"Hum...well, you can just taste it for free here, but if you want to take it away, you have to buy it." I picked two different favours with an area of 25cm2 each into the bag and went to pay for it. The owner couldn't help but laughing at my selection and said,
" They are two different prices. But anyway, I'll just weight them together and use the cheaper unit price for you. Here you go. Happy New year!!" I am sure he had never meet this kind of nitpick costumer! 根本就是來找碴的嘛！

Before we walked into Grandpa's place, I smelled something so buttery! I was nimbly looking around like a cute(?) little squirrel. Right~~ Fresh waffle~~ mmmmmmm.....Waffle~~NO! Bad Anita! B..ut...but..NO! NO!! I quickly came to my sense and pull myself into the house (with my Mum hurrying to grab me out of the 犯罪現場 (scene of crime) and me looking back my 無緣的鬆餅 (unfortunate waffle)). By the time, I entered the house, I have finished my last powdery cake and started feeling a little bit of thirsty (Oh, No!). So, of course, it's time to get some 珍珠奶茶 (bubble tea) and of course if there were 鹹酥雞 (spicy crispy chicken) available, that would be just perfect!! After I had done my field study on where to get the best bubble tea (no spicy crispy chicken on that day. I was so disappointed!), I had a plan so cunning you can put a tail on it and call it a weasel! I tried to be a lovely aunt by offering my nieces to take them out for some bubble tea. But they said no (How could they?!). I kept asking, persuading and in the end, I was begging them...to let me take them out so it wouldn't look so bad. But....they only kept giggling at my immature intention without coming with me. So I had to go with my Plan B - Go by myself! However, the most accursed thing was 30 mins after they had seen me drinking my shameful bubble tea alone, they decided to go and got them themselves!! Kids!!

The following night and the next day gathering was also very busy and exciting with a lot of relatives (14 and 39 respectively) and food (again!). Mum noticed my euphoria and had to remind/warm me it's time to stop eating...

Sign~ I just can't control my excitement during Chinese New Year. However, after all, I haven't had a real Chinese New Year for 4 years! Of course, I had to make up for it!

A bubble tea a day keep my perfect body away

I have been drinking bubble tea everyday for 3 days straight!

Then I went out to renew my national ID and tried to get some VCD out, I just can't help it, but getting some bubble tea along with some 香雞排 (crispy chicken steak) (coz I couldn't get my favourite - 鹹酥雞 (spicy crispy chicken)) or 熱狗 (hot dog) (coz I thought it has slightly less calories than 鹹酥雞 (spicy crispy chicken)) ! Yeah, Right~ But it was so yummy!

Sign...If I keep allowing this happen, soon I will be a BIG FAT Anita....but my self-control system is just so helpless when it meets bubble tea and spicy crispy chicken.

My future...

After thinking about my future for 2 months, I slowly come to some decisions.

I really enjoy the research environment at Bio. No doubt, the freedom, the ideal pure goal and the people are most attractive to me to spend another 4 years+ time of my life. Being a student and doing research are something I really enjoy in the last 6 years. However (here we go...), I feel that I would really like to see what the real world like. I probably am going to hate it and find it very boring within 3 months, but if I don't try it, I will never know. It's probably not gonna be fun, but would be definitely different, and I find that very challenging at the moment.

Actually, I change my mind quite often these days. Not because I really love to do more research, but being afraid of the real world. If I am doing a PHD now, it will be because it is the easiest way out, not because I really LOVE to do it.

I thank you all at Bio for your friendship and support especially when things aren't doing so well personally or research wise in the last 2 years. Believe or not, the most difficult part of this decision is leaving you guys.

I don't know what the real worldis like, but I heard that they eat ppl. I'll update you all after I have a taste of it (Of course, I'll be the survivor in the cruel real world. I am 打不死的小強 (the unbeatable cockroach)！).

Prince William?!

I took the bike out to revisit my childhood today.

There were some surprises on the way which reminded me of a lot of little Anita (Well, I am still little :P). Some places were gone, some places were ruined, and some places were the same, except like me, becoming older (I meant....mature, meaningful and important!).

Then, subconsciously I took a right turn and astonishingly found myself into a community where I found it very familiar. I decided to follow the road of my childhood memory to give someone a visit - my primary teacher.

After so many years, I wondered whether or not I could still find the place. And the most important, whether or not she is still living at the same place. I was a bit nervous while I knocked on the door.

*knock* *knock*

".........." No one was answering and I started feeling that it was a bad idea.
"H..ello~~Is....there anyone home?" I felt quite silly and rude, but I took the courage to ask in the end. (No...I have never played that game when I was a kid...Ummm...maybe just a few times :P). I didn't even bring any gift with me for her...
Just when I was about to turn around, there was a sound from the back of the house. "Y...es, who is it?"

She saw me with a stun (of course, it's because I was stunning!) and I kindly helped her with my name. Of course, she remembered me, just not my name. She even know which year I was born and who else were in my class! I quickly updated her with all the important milestones in the last couple of years.

"So, you have a boyfriend, right?" Here we go, the normal question of my age. *nod* *nod* *^_^*
"Taiwanese?" *Shock head* *^_^*
"老師 (Teacher), do you want to see his picture?"
I actually don't know why I did that. Normally I behaved like I am shamed of him (Quote and complain from my bf). I think I was either so happy to see her or I have been improving my girlfriend learning lesson (Hey there, see how much I am proud of you now...:P).

"Wow!!! He is so cute and handsome!!!" She amazed.
*cough* *cough* "What...what?! Really?" I was almost chocked as I was eating the fruit.
"Yes~ He is so cute like Princes William in England. Don't you think?" She was staring and admiring the picture for so long that I was afraid that she was going to eat it. *You can't keep him!* *Give it back*
"......." I silenced. ^_^""

I was 三條槓 ( three lines at the back of my head, like those Japanese comics book). Of course, he is cute, but Prince William? He is much......*cough* *cough*.

Anyway, I thought I would write this down to suck up a bit as he always thinks I am shamed of him. I hope this will slightly make it up for him :P, won't it?

I can't breath!!!

It's WINTER and guess what's the temperature!!! It's 20-29 degree today and it was 28 when I went out earlier!!!

Hot~Hot~Hot! I can't breath!

Auckland is about 15-24 degree....SUMMER!

無可救藥的愛作夢 (Helpless daydreaming)

Since I was offered this 3 days job, my parents and I have been working on our daydreaming skill!

• Maybe they are gonna pay me NT$10000 per day!
• No? Fine. I'll just take it as an experience!
• Maybe this American visitor is very cute and attractive!
• Maybe he'll think I am such a talent and offer me a high paid permanent job in his company!
• Aha! That way the rest of my life is sorted!
• What should I wear? Hum...maybe they will even give me some 製裝費 (money for outfit)!

What? None of above?! I was made redundant (before my first day of work?!)!!! The agency couldn't get hold on the American client so they had to say sorry to me!!!! *Sniff* *Sniff* All my effect turns into NOTHING! (Gee...Wake up! Daydreaming girl! It was nothing right from the beginning!)

• Are they going to give me redundancy pay?
• Can I ask for mental compensation?

*Shaking head* 真是沒救！(helpless!)

Lasik laser eye surgery

Going through this Lasik eye laser surgery is the bravest thing that I have ever done after bungy jumping!!!! I think I must have had a too boring life here in Taiwan for too long to ever consider it. Even when I think about it now, I still can't believe a person as 龜毛 (irresolute and indecisive) and ridiculous overcareful as me would have done it!!!! Would I recommend anyone to do it? Well, not if you are 櫻櫻美代子 (very bored) wanting to find some adventure in life or/and such a gambler like me!!!

I was freaking out while I was lying there. However, I was told that I was a very cooperated patient so the operation went very smoothly. The surgical team said, from their experience, female patients are much calmer than males and don't move as much as males. One of the nurse explained that very wittily,

" Yes, that's because females are too scared to MOVE and
guys are so scared that they move indiscriminately"

Did I laugh? No way! I was too scared to move (exactly!) coz they had only had done my right eye!!!

I am okay after my surgery so far. Not blind yet, maybe in 10+ years, who knows :P. 24 hours after the surgery, my worst eye was having a 20/20 (1.0) version while the other is 24/20 (1.2) last Friday. I am going to see the doctor again this Wednesday and hopefully my test will tell me more about the recovering. In a way, the surgery was a success so far, but I am still not 100% ease or celebrate it yet as I can still see some glare and I have to put different eye drops into my eyes every couple of hours to prevent infection and help recovery.

There are some regretful side effects that no one has warmed me and now I am suffering...

1. I couldn't do any reading, watch TV or computer for 24 hours. That was the most boring time in my whole life. I had to LISTEN to the TV!! Fortunately I had 3 different eye drops that kept me busy. My life entertainment depended on those "every 1-2 hours", "every 4 hours" and "right after every meal" eye drops. How exciting!!
2. I haven't washed my hairs for 5 days coz I am too chicken to do so. Mum said that's nothing. During 坐月子 (the month that after delivery the baby), she couldn't wash her hairs for a whole month! (Chinese tradition!) Well, I guess, I better start getting used to it! And yes, I haven't used any cleanser to wash my face nor any lotion...:(

戒痕 (The Ring Mark)

I took the ring off. The ring I have been worn since Greece.

It was in the end of my self-finding journey in 2003. A ring that I hoped to bring me self-confident, wisdom and direction in life. For a while, I thought I have known what I want in my life after that dreamlike journey with myself in 2003.

However, once again, I am lost.

All I have got now is that clear ring mark on my finger to remind myself once upon the time I had found myself.

要好好愛自己

下了車，她轉過身，把口袋中那對我們一起買的髮束拆開。
拿著其中一個髮束，握著我的手說：
「妳收著，每當妳帶著它的時候，要記得-要好好愛自己！ 」
「喜歡上一個人是很幸福的！」 她說。

認識妳，是件很幸福的事！

那一夜，我決定把那一份關懷永遠帶在身上。
我會努力的好好愛自己 ─ 為妳、為我、為他。